Aaron's Articles - 2013

Hello Dear Souls,

This page is a collection of articles I will be sharing on the website as my heart is moved to do so.  They each honestly apply to my own life and experiences in some way.  What we learn and how we grow all comes out in what we teach.  So from my experiences in life, the sufferings, joy and difficulties I face you will find deeply expressed in all that I have to share and give.  I hope you find some help and understanding in these pages.  I hope these heartfelt words will somehow bring deeper understanding and healing to your hearts and souls.

With deep tenderness and love!

Aaron

Hello Everyone,

I wanted to share the link to my You Tube Channel so you can view the videos I have posted regarding some of the things I have been sharing with all of you.

http://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1VPWru_32BIoPPBAKBgXxA

With Much Aloha!

Aaron

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"LOVE & INTIMACY OR JUST SEX"

I have been meditating on doing this article for several weeks.  We live in a world today that is so much about pleasure and immediate gratification!  For me, I tend to look more long term of what I want and where I want to be in life.  Most people are not looking from this same view point.  I am sharing this all from my view point, which I know many share my views in this, but most do not look at it this way.

I see the world has turned to a great sexual energy to find the ultimate pleasures in life.  I do not see this as a good thing at all.  For me, this is part of what is wrong all around us.  People are afraid of true heart intimacy and making a commitment to a relationship.  It is so much easier just to hook up and have sex.  Even when two people are in a relationship, most of the time it is based too much about sex.  Then, when the sexual energy has lost its charm, it is time to move on and find someone else.   For the majority of people today, changing partners in life has become more like the simple act of changing clothes!  For me, when I find the one soul I feel I can share and spend the rest of my life with, then I will consider sharing my heart on the level of making love with her.  I have also found I would rather be alone than be in a relationship full of conflict and drama all the time.

To live with harmony, compassion, forgiveness and balance is so important.  It is then we can connect in the heart, soul, mind and spirit.  It is then when I can say ok now we are ready to make love!  To just go out with a woman for dinner or meet at the beach then go someplace and just have sex, I simply cannot do this!  My heart has grown beyond who I was when I was young.  To me it is about feeding the heart and soul with true deep passionate love.  Making that deep commitment of a Forever love and then working to keep our vows and commitments to each other.

I have found this love from someone but not the effort or commitment to the relationship.  We are each in a different place in life.  Some people are happy just to hook up with others and just have sex.  I am not saying this article is for them to read or even agree with.  I am simply saying I do not see life from this view point.  I was sexually abused as a child many times, so it taught me sex was love.  As I have grown in life, I came to see that sex is an act of pleasure and gratification.  It has nothing to do with love!  For me, when my heart is in this deeply devoted relationship with a woman and I have vowed in my heart to love her and be with her the rest of this life, then for us to make love as often as possible is wonderful!  Again, I am writing from my view point.  To make love on every level of the heart, soul, spirit, mind, and body is the most amazing time of sharing true love two people can share together.

I live here in Maui.  I go to the beach around four times a week.  There are always many beautiful women there, so for me, I have to work to stay in my heart and not respond to any of the sexual energy I may come across at the beach or for that matter at the grocery store for I am looking for that one special heart and soul that is a mature fit for me.  We live in a world of free sexuality so it is encouraged just to hook and feel the pleasure.  But when you are on a deeply devoted spiritual path in life, seeking the deep desires of the heart, there are certain things in life we must say no to for the growth and purity of our heart and souls.

I look at this as the same as not doing drugs, not drinking too much alcohol, eating properly and exercising properly as well.  I am not saying when I feel lonely, sad or desire the intimacy of a woman that it is easy to keep myself in my heart and not have sex at all.  I simply feel that I want to share my life and my heart with one woman actually forever!  I want to keep my heart, my mind and my body pure, to deeply devote myself to love and compassion, to helping other people to grow!  Then when I have the relationship I desire that is completely based on love and devotion to compassion with each other, I will be very happy to share our bodies together, to hold each other, to look deep into each other’s eyes, to enjoy and appreciate each moment we have together, and then when we make love, it is a deep expression of our love for each other and never just having sex!  It is about the commitment to love, to honor, to adore and completely care for each other that really matters.  To have super deep connections to know each other’s inner most thoughts and feelings!  To feel the person even when you are a thousand miles apart!  To know they love you and adore you even when you screw up and make a mistake in life, big or small!

What do I hope to accomplish by sharing this from my own heart!  I hope to encourage others to this kind of love and devotion, to help people to see we must make a commitment to what we want in life even if we do not currently have the desires of our heart.  For me to have this love and devotion with a woman is my greatest desire in life!  It has been my greatest desire since I was a young boy.  Now at fifty years old, I am purifying my own heart and more deeply devoting myself to this love and compassion I desire, to say no to all the sexual energy running around free to dive into, and to say no, I want much more than this in life and I am willing to keep myself separated until I have found what I truly want and desire in life!

I believe if we will devote ourselves to this kind of love and compassion in a relationship, when we get married, we will stay married and we would find divorce simply not to be an easy option!  But I have found it takes two people who are mature enough to live this on a daily basis.  You cannot just do as you please in life and bring harm to the other person or be so independent you plan your life like you are not in a relationship.  It takes two people to become a couple and have a relationship.  To keep the love and intimacy, we must have a pure devoted love and the maturity to live with it each day!  We must make the relationship a great priority in our lives!  Honestly, if you want your relationship to be healthy and last, then you need to make it the first priority in life!  For me to love and be loved is of the greatest value in this life but for it to be a healthy love that brings you a greater maturity each day!  Here is the reality.  Sex and just sexual energy has nothing to do with true love and compassion.  I truly believe it is just the opposite and a great distraction to growing and maturing in true love and compassion!  For those who might take this as an absolute, to be completely devoted to the love with your partner and sharing complete intimacy on every level is the most amazing act of love we can find as a couple.  At the same time, making love is only a small part of the relationship!  As with everything in life, we have to have balance!  So for me, it is better to stay alone and say no to all the free sex that is so easy to find and to each day more deeply devote myself to true love and compassion, to have faith one day I will find that other soul who will devote herself as deeply to a life of compassion as I desire.

So never give up on love and Intimacy.  Have patience and wait until you find it to be true!  Most of all, do not settle for less than a true, mature and healthy relationship, but also realize, it is first you that has to be healthy.  Do not blame anything on anyone else!  You and I create the relationships we have through the energy we have in our own heart, positive or negative.

With much compassion!

Aaron 12-19-13

"LIVING WITH INTEGRITY"

To live and walk with complete integrity of the heart is a very deep and difficult thing to do in the days we live in!  Yet without this complete integrity, we cannot grow and mature into a deeply compassionate human being.  We have to learn not to give up our heart and soul for the material world around us or for the acceptance of other people.  We each have a different path to walk in life and we have to find the path of the heart that we are called to.  It is so easy to go along with the crowd and do what everyone else is doing; drinking, having a party, and just playing games with life.  It is wonderful to enjoy life have fun and play like a child, but it is not ok to do this at the expense and harm of other people.  This seems to be the greatest problem today with the lack of integrity and honor in the world in general.  People have been taught to just focus on what they want and it is all about self and the desires of self!  I, me and mine is the general attitude of the world today.  It is about what we get, gain and gather in life, when in reality, it is much more important as to whom we become in our heart, words and actions!

This is where we lose the integrity of the heart!  When we truly find the essence of life and the value of the human soul, then we will no longer sacrifice the hearts and needs of other people just to get what we want in life.  Part of our process in choosing direction in our lives will be a simple fact of taking the time to think about how will my choices or decisions will affect the people around me.  Also, if someone did this to me, how would I feel?  We have to be connected to the heart of Divine compassion to a level in which we will not do any harm to other people or the creation around us, where we are so connected to this Divine compassion that each thought we have, our energy and/or actions will all fall in line with doing no harm, to where we have given our life over to this reality of allowing God to lead our lives and that we have matured to the place we bring healing to everyone we come into contact with, not creating conflict and pain.  As we mature, we will come to the point that we no longer create any conflict or drama in our lives, but that we will create a balance, harmony and bring compassionate healing into our lives and those we come into contact with! 

This is what we are going through in the world today.  The divine is working to bring a great shift of the energy in the planet and every soul in it from this selfish energy that has created so much pain and sorrow in life to the compassion that brings us to maturity and healing!

We first have to come to understand that the Divine integrity of the heart has little to do with the selfish behavior mankind displays on a daily basis.  Having been in business for myself the last thirty years, I have come to see the worst of people and how they will try their best to take advantage of everything to get what they want no matter how much it hurts other people.  I have experienced this in my own personal life as well.  It does not matter how deeply someone may hurt us or take advantage of our kindness!  What does matter is that no matter what, we do not return the negative that has been done to us but rather we rise above the negative energy that has harmed our heart and soul and that we show respect and kindness to everyone no matter how deeply they have harmed you or me.

This is true integrity!  This is why I said it is Divine Integrity, for in our humanness, we tend to get angry and strike back, or we get hurt and run away to lick our wounds!  We have to grow and mature beyond these reactions so that we become a healing force of love to all those we come in contact with!  When we will live with and daily walk with this Divine Integrity, it brings out the essence of all life, which is the Divine love and compassion!  These powerful Virtues of God’s Heart are more powerful than any force in the Universe!  When put into true practice from the heart, nothing can conquer true Divine Integrity, Love and Compassion!!

We have to allow ourselves to become living breathing Divine Integrity without even a little compromise!!  It is in living this life from the heart of the Divine without the slightest compromise that we will find a freedom and power to walk this earth with confidence that is truly Divine!  We will also find the healing energy to free other souls to walk this path as well for we are all in great need of healing on many levels.  We have to let go of the wounds of the past and open our hearts to the healing found in the forgiveness of this present moment!

Let us purpose to live with true Integrity of the heart and soul!

Aaron 11-30-13

"MOMENT BY MOMENT"

It is really easy for people to talk about all the spiritual ideas and beliefs in life.  It is all together completely another reality to live this life in your heart and in a deep place of compassion, Moment by Moment in each day!!  This is where the crowd of people who are teaching and sharing all their wonderful wisdom are weeded out to just a few.  I have searched most of my adult life for one or two people who were really deep and living this life of compassion and forgiveness as a reality and not just talking about it or teaching it out of some books they have read!  The sad reality is there are so few who are willing to put a life of service to humanity and compassion at the very top of their priority list and never compromise the integrity of truth and compassion, to never sell out for comfort, money or acceptance of the general public or the acceptance of even your family!  I have found that this is one of the greatest weaknesses we have as a human being; wanting to be loved and accepted.  Acceptance is fine as long as we do not compromise the integrity of truth and compassion to gain it.

People travel the world to go in search of a spiritual awakening, but is this what we are really searching for or are we just wanting someone to tell us what we want to hear and help us feel a little better about our selfish behavior.  To live this life Moment by Moment in true compassion and humility, to truly transcend the darkness of our humanity and become a soul of complete healing energy for the world around us, this is what we really need in this life!  Someone asked me in the last few days, “What is the end purpose of life and spiritual growth?”  Summed up, it is simply to completely surrender to God and come to know God completely as God Knows us in every way, to become completely one with the Divine in all we think, say and in our actions as well!  How do we live this relationship Moment by Moment here in this life?  We begin to express this divine love and compassion.  The goal for our days here on this earth is to share this enough and multiply this in so many people that we can truly shift the energy in this planet from one of negative destructive darkness that controls the world at this current time to a light and love that holds the world and the people in it to a higher accountability; one in which we have come to such a oneness with God the creator that we have brought this Divine healing energy into our daily lives here on this planet, one in which no one can deny the power we have come to be one with and that there is truly a Divine God that is in charge of this world and this universe!

It is taking a deep stillness and silence of my heart, mind and body to come to this awareness.  We must learn to listen on such a deeper level to the voice of the Divine!  We have two ears and one mouth for a reason!  We need to listen twice as much as we talk!  It is in the quietness of the heart, mind and body that we can truly begin to listen to the calling of the Divine nature!  We have to learn to be strong by being gentle!  We have to learn to have patience by waiting on things in life and waiting on other people!  We have to learn to be calm by living in the storms of life!  We have to learn not to strike people back by taking a blow from other people and only returning compassion!  We have to learn Justice by suffering the injustices in life!  We have to learn to take the pain of others and turn it into a powerful joy in our hearts and teach those in pain how to be freed of this sorrow they carry!  We have to conquer all the negative weaknesses of our humanity so we become truly free to walk in peace and harmony and to share love and compassion with others no matter how much negative energy and actions are thrown at us!

How do we learn this?  Truly Moment by Moment each day as we walk through the fires of life!  Sometimes it is the simple things we learn, to listen to our heart and the Divine, and then we can listen when the difficult and trying times come.  I know for me, so much of the time I now hear, “Just wait.  Have patience.  Do not force anything, but allow life and the Divine to bring about what you need.”  For so many years I would see so much of my life before it would happen.  I would see the same for other people as well!  There were only sometimes I was surprised or someone would tell me something I did not already know or see!  It was more just about focusing on what I saw and working to that goal.  Now it has changed to what I see as a deeper place in my walk.  I have an idea of the direction I am going, but there are so many details I simply do not know.  So now when people ask me, what will you do, most of the time I just have to answer Honestly that I do not know yet!  I am also learning a deeper Patience and trust with the Divine to guide me and tell me in the “Moment” what I need to know instead of knowing so many things so far ahead of time!

I am still working to focus on the things I am shown to work on and working to let all the rest go, like letting go of all my family back in Texas.  This is not so easy in itself.  Letting go of the love I have come to know the last two years with the most amazing woman I have ever known, trusting in the divine if it is our destiny to spend our lives together the Divine will bring us back to each other and for me just to stand in the love I know for this soul and wait!  Here again, this time of waiting and being prepared; learning to be alone, to stand alone, to live alone, to eat alone, to spend most of my time day in and day out alone.  Now I know we are never really alone, but when you have been used to be surrounded by people all your life in one way or another, when you are truly alone and have no one else to spend time with, then you are alone in so many ways.  I am coming to peace with knowing this level of silence and stillness.  I am coming to understand the purpose is to connect me more deeply with the true Divine in every way, on every level, to free my heart to love deeply, completely and compassionately without conditions and to embrace this true love and compassion beyond any human level of understanding!

It is only as I am truly learning to exist and live Moment By Moment that I am finding this peace and harmony with life and the universe in the most intimate way!  My hope in this is to encourage each of you to live Moment By Moment!  Let go of the past.  Two seconds ago is the past and do not live in tomorrow!  Just relax and connect to your heart and the Divine creator right now!

With great hope for our future and healing!!

"FOREVER LOVE"

I want to talk today about relationships and marriage.  When I was a child, I was led to believe that marriage was a forever relationship, that when you promised to love and care for the other person it was forever.  I still believe this with all of my heart.  The problem I have found in this life is people do not take commitment seriously or they are afraid to make this kind of commitment.

When was twenty-six, I got married for the first time.  We have five children together and to me it was forever.  When after nine years it did not work out, I was heartbroken for several years.  My dream of being married one time to the same person was shattered.  I married a second time and it lasted for basically four months.  Again, my ideals of what a marriage was supposed to be were completely shaken.  After several years apart, my first wife and I tried marriage again to see if we could make it work out.  This was now my third time being married and it lasted about a year.  It took several years for us to let go and we have not spoken in many years now.

Please notice, I am not pointing any fingers here.  I am just sharing the events.  I have come to see that I have had some deep karma to work out and that we each have a role to play in the karmic wheel of life.  After three times and each not lasting the lifetime I was looking for, I had honestly given up completely on marriage and the idea of that kind of relationship.  I had decided if I met someone, we would just live together, but I had in no way given up on True Love or finding my soul mate.  But what I did do is separate myself for five years and just focused on myself growing and taking care of my children.  I went on about three dates a year but nothing to speak of in any serious form.

Through this time and back to the year 1999, I had dreams and visitations from a woman.  Our hearts grew close and I could always feel her spirit close to me.  In the beginning of the spiritual visits and dreams, I could only see her back.  Through the years as we grew closer in the spiritual world, then the dreams and visitations became more intimate.  As time passed, she would then come and I could see the front of her and her facial features, but never perfectly clear.  They were always hidden a little bit.  As time passed, I began to search deeply for her all over the world through dating sites, in my dreams, and in my meditations.  I could feel her searching just as deeply and longing for me as I did for her.  I felt as time passed I was gaining more clarity about her and where she was from in this world.

As time passed, it was now 2010 in my life and I was being directed that I was leaving Texas and going to live overseas some place.  All this time, my greatest desire and longing was to find my sweetheart!  It was truly a burning fire inside of me and nothing could satisfy it except to find her.  By July 2011, I knew I was coming to Hawaii.  I had also felt through my dreams and the desires of my heart that my sweetheart was Japanese and from Japan.  So before I felt I was to go to Hawaii, I was researching to go to Japan.  But in the end, I felt it was Hawaii I was to go to and that I would meet my sweetheart here in Hawaii and that we would make a trip together to go to Japan.  I booked a room in Honolulu for three weeks and thought I would see what would happen.  I would like to remind everyone that I was ill when I left Texas and was in great need of healing in many ways, so it was a trip of faith on many levels and areas of my life.  My only plan was that if I did not feel led to stay in Honolulu, I would go to Maui.

Six days before my time was up at the hotel, I met this Beautiful Japanese woman.  It was amazing from the moment I saw her eyes!!  We met on October 7^th.  We talked for six hours the first night.  I knew when I met her I had no desire to meet anyone else.  We spent a lot more time together over the next couple of days.  We went to Maui together on Sunday the 10^th.  This is where she was currently living, in Maui.  She was leaving the following Wednesday to go to Japan.  We ended up going to Japan together that day, the 13^th of October, and we stayed ten days.  She had to return for work.  It was amazing in so many ways how we met and how quickly we just melted together.  We returned to Maui on the 25^th of October.  The 24^th was my birthday so I was in Japan for my 48^th birthday.  It was the best birthday I have ever had in my life.  It was heavenly from the first moment just as I had always felt it would be.

Then when we got back, we had to find a place to live.  We stayed with one of her friends for about ten days and then we moved into a little house.  I had asked her to marry me when we were in Japan on top of this beautiful mountain that had a huge flower garden on the top of the mountain.  This was part of our plans, to get married when we returned to Maui.  I previously had no desire to get married again, but honestly, the moment I looked into her eyes, I knew this was the woman I had longed for and all I wanted was to marry her.

We made plans to get married within a couple of weeks but she was not ready and got a little scared.  I suggested that we just have a spiritual wedding with only her and me.  We had planned to get married on 11/11/11.  In the end, we did this with just her and me.  It was so powerful on so many levels!  Absolutely amazing is the best way to put it.

I told her when she was ready we could get married with the state documents.  I wanted us to both be at perfect peace when we got married with neither one of us being afraid but 1,000% sure.  On 11/11/11, we both promised to love and care for each other forever and I know we both meant this from the depths of our hearts!

Shortly before this, we started to have many difficulties.  Honestly, neither one of us knew exactly how to handle the things that happened and came up.  Today is exactly two years since we got married before the Divine and promised each other to be together and to care and love each other Forever!  We have separated many times over the last two years, but each time we got back together, we were both more open and we were both more in love with each other.

I had a friend recently tell me about the Twin Flames relationship.  As I read it, the whole thing fit her and I to a perfect description.  It helped me to understand some of the dynamics of what was going on between her and I.  I find today on 11/11/13, I am alone here at the house again, that my sweetheart and I are separated yet again.  This time is the longest we have gone with no communication; over two months now.  This has been one of the most difficult things I have ever gone through.  No matter what happens, I just love her more and desire to be with her more.  Because she has chosen to leave and she wanted to make her life without me, I have not made any attempt to contact her.  I miss her and long for her every day and every night.  I am holding space for her.  I truly have no desire for anyone else.  At the same time, choosing to stand and wait for her to return is so deeply painful, to really trust this will happen.

It is such a fine line between trusting for her heart to open more and for her to return, and letting her go so we can both move forward in life!  At points I feel so strongly she is truly my soul mate and other times I lose this and just do not know what to do!  So why am I sharing all of this?

I think it is deeply important that we each find our soul mate in this lifetime as in any other lifetime as well.  When my sweetheart and I are together and both of us in our hearts, it is simply the most powerful, tender and amazing love I have ever experienced in my lifetime.  I have not seen this kind of love with anyone or even read about this depth of love in any books.  She is my first thought as I wake up, my last as I go to sleep, and with each breath I take, she is in each thought day and night.  It is a bond that I cannot break in any way, nor do I wish to.  Yet what remains to be seen is if this is the same for her.

In a recent article I had shared that I have had a vision since I was five years old that I was still waiting for this vision to be completed in this life!  The vision is this situation with my sweetheart.  I am working daily to surrender this all to the Divine and let the Divine bring forth what is meant to be.  I also know there are many of you out there in the same boat as me, searching for the one true lasting love!  I have had to work so hard in my life not to harden my heart due to all the pain and abuse caused by others in my life.  I still am working each moment to become softer, for both my sweetheart and I have to grow for us to become of one heart and one soul in our daily lives.  

She would tell me the safest place she had ever felt in her life was in my arms!  When we were both in our hearts and compassion, I could say the same; the safest place I had ever felt was when she was in my arms!  I could just stay there for hours and hours and forget the rest of the world!  We both have had difficult things to work out of our hearts, healing needed and some complete changes only the Divine can bring about.  But no matter how difficult it has been, my love for her has only grown stronger and has helped to change me to love others more deeply and unconditionally.  I have never had this kind of love with anyone before.  Do not get me wrong.  I have always loved with all of my heart with everyone in my life, but this has taken it beyond any kind of human love and taken it to a completely Divine love!  Through my love for her, I have more deeply come to understand true love, true compassion and how deeply the Divine loves each of us.  The love we have for each other I can honestly say has helped to heal me and open me up on a truly Divine level!!  I send her all the love and compassion I can each day and night, working to trust that this all has a purpose and at the same time to let her go so she can make the choices she desires in life, allowing fate and destiny to have their way through the Divine plan!

This is dealing with all my weaknesses and any place that my mind would want to try to control anything.  I am also going through this same kind of letting go in every area of my life.  Any illusions that my mind has on being in control are being washed away.  I am simply working to surrender to the Divine in all I do so that I may truly learn what “Forever Love” really is!

We have to stop with all the play love.  People today change partners as often as they change clothes.  Relationships have become disposable rather than “Forever.”  As for me, I simply want one woman to share my life with and it to be “Forever Love” as we both promised each other.  This is a deeply personal area for me and has been my most difficult growth and greatest joy over all these years of waiting!  So you see, without Patience, how we can find any truth, wisdom, compassion, love or Maturity!

In all this I have my good days and my difficult days.  Today is our two year anniversary and I feel the depth of emptiness and longing for her.  She asked me to respect her desire to live her life without me.  I told her I would do this for her as she asked me too.  I find I have to walk this out day by day in my own heart and have patience to allow life to unfold as it is supposed to without me trying to make it happen my way.  I have learned the way of the divine is always the very best way!  This is where we are at in the world today! Our fate is deeply in our hands!  But without the Divine to help us and intervene on the behalf of humanity, I feel we will destroy the world we live in!

For me personally, I feel I have to work with all of my heart to have the true love and tenderness I desire, but without the Divine to intervene for me on my behalf, I feel I cannot do this on my own.  I must connect completely with the Divine creator to accomplish my purpose in this life!  As I release this for you to take to heart, I release my own desires and my own life to the direction of the Divine Creator!

I hope this will help just one soul in your path!

With much compassion!

"EMBRACING PATIENCE"

I think in most of the world people are taught to be demanding and want everything in life right now!  A friend of mine said the other day, “God give me patience and do it right now!”  This is really what I want to work with in this stage of the article.  I have come to see in life that without a very deep level of patience, we simply cannot mature.  I am also discovering as I grow and mature more deeply, it requires a deeper level of patience that my mind has to simply let go because I cannot follow it with my mind.

I have had many people tell me for many years that I was the most patient person they had ever met.  I would always say thank you and add the following comment!  “You see the work of patience from me, but you do not live inside of me to see how hard I have to work to be Patient.”  In some cases in life, it is not difficult to be patient, and then in other cases, it is so deeply difficult that it is painful.

I am learning a patience that goes beyond the human mind and the human application.  It is simply from the divine and I could not follow it in my human nature.  Our human nature is just the opposite of patience!  It is difficult for us to wait for anything.  As I have been meditating lately seeking wisdom in my life and direction, I am seeing divine Patience at work that just boggles my mind.  I want things to move more quickly so I can move forward with what I feel I am supposed to do in life, yet I continually see the Hand of the Divine slowing my life down, making me spend hours a day in stillness and mediation, mainly alone.  I see myself being drawn back from much human contact to very little human contact at this point.  I had some friends visit me from Canada last month.  He stated that he liked my cave!  He recognized the time of separation I am in.  Many times in my life I have gone through this.  I recently stated in another article that I felt like a monk many times and when I was young I wanted to go be a monk in Tibet.

The energy is so intense right now and has been for a long time in my life.  I see this is now manifesting into the rest of the world as well.  The energy of the earth has become very intense all over the world.  Look at the degree and magnitude of the typhoons, earthquakes and all the rest of the conflict coming out of the earth’s energy!  What does this have to do with patience you might ask?  Everything!!  The Heart and energy of the earth has been speaking to us for a very long time, trying to get the attention of the human race!  We have for the most part completely ignored the cry of the planet!  Even all of creation is working to teach us Patience.  Now we have to wake up and begin to make these changes in our own lives.  Then this will filter into the lives of the people all around us!

There are so many things in my life I am learning to be patient and wait for; the things I need to come into my life, things I seek and desire to change, simple answers I seek for direction.  All I hear is just “let go and be Patient!”  I am learning never to force anything, even a little bit; even the parts of my life that I do not have the ability to change at the moment.  I can either get deeply frustrated or I can continue to do the energy work I need to and help other people that I need to.  This will bring about the changes needed in my life for me to grow and mature each day in my words moving forward in the direction my heart is being called.  Yet I openly surrender to the Divine to allow everything to be Divinely guided, for each footstep to follow the wisdom and compassion of the Divine.  I have no interest in feeding my weaknesses or anyone else’s weaknesses.   We have to learn to be patient with ourselves first!  We have to learn to be compassionate, tender and kind with ourselves.  We have to learn the Divine Patience and compassion for ourselves!!!  This is a deep work for me.  I have always been so hard on myself, and then at times in my past, I have been hard on other people as well.  For this I am deeply remorseful!  As I am growing right now, I have to forgive myself more deeply where I failed to love others in the past as deeply as I would have liked to; you know, all the mistakes we make in our youth!  I find that even with all of this, I have to learn to be tender and patient with my own heart, not to be so hard on myself when I make a mistake!

How many of you can identify with what I am sharing here?  How many of you are really hard on yourself?  How many of you have trouble with being patient?  How many of you see how the earth is sending us a deep message to change our ways?  You see, we must become a Race of people who are filled with Patience, Humility and Compassion!  We have to replace the harshness and greed with compassion and patience!

Sometimes it is knowing what to say for something I am writing.  Other times it takes days or even weeks for the words to mature in my heart to express the wisdom, Patience and compassion from the Divine creator.  There is one area of my life where I have been waiting for a vision to become complete.  I have had this vision since I was a very young child; four or five years old.  I started actively searching for the person in my heart when I was seventeen years old.  I feel two years ago I met this person to share the vision and work with, but now I find I am still waiting for this vision I had to be completed.  I have had to let go of all of it and surrender the vision as I have had to do many times, still learning to be patient and trust that the divine knows better for me what I need in this life!  If I look at it being from the age of five years old, I have been waiting for forty-five years to see the vision I had as a child to be completely manifested into this world as a complete reality.

There are several other things I am waiting for in life to fulfill.  Many of them have taken many years to see happen.  Sometimes I see something and it happens very quickly, but there are those spiritual realities that take many years to manifest.  One of the resolves of true patience is that we will do nothing to force anything in life; we will wait for things to develop naturally, in a natural time.  I am not saying we do not have our part in all of this.  We do.  At any given time, our parts may differ from each other!  This time in my life is one of growing beyond any place of comfort in my mind, heart and body, to develop a divine patience that I see God wants us to have for each other, for ourselves and for humanity; the unlimited Patience that the Divine has for each of us!

What we must do is now place more of a priority on the spiritual growth and development of the human race than we have ever given the development of the materialized world!  We must value the growth and wisdom of the human heart and soul above all aspects of money and material possessions!  We are what we create.  We are what we have created in this world of conflict!  Now it is up to you and me to find the patience, wisdom and compassion to create a world of harmony and healing, not only to heal the needs and hearts of the people, but to heal the planet we live on!

With Compassion!

"LIFES MANY CHANGES ~ RELEASING THE PAST"

For several years now, I have been going through many changes.  I am in a season of letting go of the old and the past to make way for the new and what is ahead in my future.  I am setting off more deeply into the unknown, looking to the future to find the path that my heart so longs for.  I am finding that if we do not release anything we are holding onto from the past, it holds us in the past and hinders our moving forward into today and our being able to prepare for tomorrow!  What I am going to share is some of what I am going through to let go of the past and my life in Texas, to work toward moving forward into the life I have found here in Maui, and wherever it may be leading me to.  We are all going through many changes as the energy in our time and planet is changing!

I had been feeling many things weighing me down.  I realized that some of the things were things in my past that I needed to work to release.  While in Texas, I worked hard to create several businesses.  We started a residential construction company in 1999, an advertising magazine in 2002 and a Mexican Import company in 2003.  In 2007, we began developing a 22 acre property and turned it into a beautiful organic green ranch.  All of this was done with the help of my family who now operates all of the businesses.  We have all continued to work together to help the companies grow and continue to develop the ranch as well.

In 2011, I left all of this behind to follow the leading of my heart and I moved to Maui, Hawaii.  It has come to the point where I do not feel that I am to go back to Texas at all, that my path is to be here in Maui for now.  I am feeling very strongly that it is time to let go of the businesses back in Texas so that I can keep my focus on the path of my heart; my writings, healing work, readings and consultations with people.

I have been very involved in helping to watch over things from a distance until recently.  It has been difficult to carry all of the responsibility since I am not there anymore.  I began to see that it was time to draw back from the depth I was involved to make sure that those who were going to be taking over the businesses in Texas were ready and fully educated and prepared to do so, making sure their communication with each other was established as well so that things could continue to work, flow and to grow.  Since I no longer feel I am supposed to be involved with all of it, I realized it was time to pass it on to those who have worked so hard to help me develop all of it.

As part of letting go and moving forward, by December 31^st, I am going to be signing everything I can over to my family so that we can start next year with a new direction for everyone.  I am going to be doing this with or without receiving any money for a down payment and with or without the money to get things out of my name and clear all the debt.  It has been difficult for my family to find a loan to buy the companies, so this is what I feel I have to do to be able to move forward in my life; releasing everything I worked hard to create to my family who helped me create it all.  For me I see that it is important for me to let go and trust the Divine to take care of my needs and the needs of my family.

We are going to be moving forward with the business transition but we have also put the ranch up for sale.  When it sells, it will clear all of our debt and give everyone a fresh start.  If you would like to see what we have created at the ranch, you may visit www.ayraamfarms.com to view pictures and see more information.

I am sharing all this to ask for your prayers for a speedy transition.  I also am sharing my experience in releasing the past because I know there are others of you that feel you are being asked to let go of things from the past that are holding on to you or you are holding on to.  The world is going through a deep transition that is affecting all of us.  It is my hope that you will find the release to let go and find the faith and trust to move forward.

With Much Compassion,

"DIVINE PATEINCE"

I have looked for and asked for patience for the last thirty years.  I see there has been a lot of sharing from many people on this subject lately.  When I was seventeen years old, I had a vision and I started searching for the promise of the vision.  I have been faithful every day to look for the fulfillment of that vision.  When I was forty-seven, I felt I had found what I was looking for from this vision but I had no idea that I was to have to wait longer for the Vision to be completed.  Now, twenty-five months and so many difficulties later, tests and lessons, I am learning there is a Divine Patience that we as human beings have no comprehension of at all!

I felt when I arrived in Hawaii and met the person I had seen in the vision long ago, that everything would simply fall into place and the rest of the vision would unfold.  Well it has been a deep and difficult battle all the way.  I have been learning a much deeper truth and reality of Never Give Up!  So many times it has looked like all is well and the vision was coming into complete harmony as I had seen so many years ago!  I thought I had won and learned a great deal of patience by waiting thirty years to meet the person in my vision.  I had no idea I had just begun this journey of the heart and soul.  After being so close to death so many times and learning no matter what to Never Give Up, I thought I had learned how to never give up!  But this journey I have gone through over the last two years has taken me way beyond anything I could have ever understood about both; about living from my heart to Never Give Up and a living, breathing, Patience!  But I have to be honest.  I have been taken past my limits in both Areas!!

I have gone out in the universe far from what I have known.  All the years before laid a deep foundation in me so I could be taken completely past the limitations of my mind and ego!  I feel I have fallen short so many times in the past two years in both areas!  I gave up on the thing that meant the most to me and I lost my patience many times!  Over the past two years, I have fallen down many times and failed to love completely and unconditionally the one soul who I have come to love the most!  The one thing I can say is I have gotten up one more time than I have fallen down but it has been very humbling.  I have been taught a lesson I could not have even begun to understand even a few months ago!  I believe when we make a sacred vow, it is just that; SACRED!  It is not acceptable to break a vow that is made from the heart and soul from a pure place of truth.  I am a person who, when I make a promise, will keep it at all cost.  I never make a promise lightly!

I made a sacred vow and promise two years ago that I have gained a new understanding from.  We can make a promise and a vow that are sacred from the heart of the Divine and then it seems all the waves of negative energy just burst forth to do everything possible to get you to break your vow and your promise!  As I said, I have fallen many times in trying to keep this vow, but each time I have fought with all of my heart to get back up again and regain the truth of this vow in my heart.  I have also had to be very patient with myself.  Honestly, I am not accustomed to falling in such a manner and wavering in my commitment to my promise, but I never expected so many things to happen to cause me to lose my focus and fall with such deep pain.

Honestly, such honor and integrity are so important to me.  I would give my life before I would compromise the true Honor of the heart and soul.  This deeper Divine Patience has made me grow like no other time in my life.  It seems the thirty years I waited to see the first part of the vision was just the smallest part of the test and growth.  Then the development over the last two years seems to have been more difficult and more painful than the first thirty years I waited to see the vision manifest into reality in the earthly realm in front of my eyes where I could touch it with my hands and see it with my eyes.  As I said, I really had no idea what the following two years were to hold for me to learn, grow in such joy, but such pain and sorrow as well.

When I arrived here two years ago, I saw some things very clearly and thought they were to begin within just two or three months.  But now, twenty-four months later, I am still waiting for these things to become a reality that my hands can touch.  In ways, I am deeply grieved that I failed to stay in a place of unconditional love!  Again though, what I knew of this two years ago does not even come close to what I know and understand as unconditional love at this present moment!!  I see the very, very patient work the Divine is doing in me and how deeply compassionately I am being taught truly Divine patience, compassion, love and so much more deeply to Never Give Up!  In this vision I was given something I would give my life for easily, but there are many ways for us to give our life for someone or something.  To be purely devoted to compassion and love for another soul is one of the greatest gifts we can be given or give to someone else.  But I have learned for us to stay completely in a position in our heart of pure Divine patience and unconditional love is still more than I know how to live in each moment each day!  I openly humble myself and admit I am like a child and daily learning to love without precondition and I did my best each moment but it was beyond what I knew how to actually do!  I seek to release this and accept forgiveness for myself, trusting the Divine will wash my heart and give me the opportunity to complete this vision and become the man who can stay in my heart with true compassion and love, completely and unconditionally, to bring healing to all involved, to accept and gain the Divine Patience that I have begun to see is far beyond what I have ever known in this lifetime!

I am reminded of years ago.  I bought a horse that was extremely spooky.  The man who sold him to me told me straight out, “Aaron, if you find that this horse is too much for you, that he is beyond your experience, you may return him to me!”  After working with this horse for about two months, I had come to the place to see he was not a horse I was ready for.  It was not pleasant or peaceful for me to work with him or try to ride him.  The horse was so terrified of someone riding him, he would shake horribly all over his body when you put a saddle on him, and even worse, when you tried to get on him.  Finally I called the guy and told him it was not at all peaceful for me to work with the horse and I wanted to return him.  The one thing the man told me was this; “Aaron, you have gained my respect because you had the humility to be honest and admit the horse was too much and call me.”  Later in life, I was able to work with horses like this and some more difficult.

Sometimes we have to see, admit and embrace our weakness to be able to find the strength to gain the victory over the problem.  I want more than all else in my life to see this vision I had thirty-three years ago now be completed and fulfilled.  I see part of how I do this is to learn a divine Patience that I have never seen anywhere in my life, as well, to find a deeper reality in my own heart and soul, a much more pure resolve within myself to Never Give Up at all!!  I see we can learn both of these things in one way in our lives, even many ways, but then we find ourselves in a situation that for our own weaknesses we cannot completely live each moment, no matter how hard we put our heart and mind to it!  Now I make no excuse for falling.  I am standing again, working to accomplish this new level of Patience, a deeper level of Unconditional compassion and love, as well to find the deeper resolve within myself to never give up!

Another part of how I achieve all of this is to admit I failed and fell short many times of my goal to stay in my heart with compassion!  Not because I did not make the great effort, because I did each moment, but because like with the horse, I lacked the maturity and life experience to accomplish my Goal of unconditional love.  I also see I needed a great deal of healing within myself as well.  I think part of the message in all of this tonight is we are going to have to admit we do not have all the wisdom and maturity to accomplish the Virtues of the Divine in our present state!  We are going to have to do a lot of growing and Maturing to be able to even love the person who we adore the most with Divine, unconditional, compassion and love, simply because we have not really seen this in our world yet, nor do we really know how to do this with everyone all the time!  So for me, I know I want to do this with all my heart.  I feel there is no lack of desire in me to love completely, just a lack of wisdom, patience, and maturity!

So with this, I ask for all these thing to be given to my heart from a purity of the Divine!

With much Compassion for our weaknesses!

"ANGUISH OF THE HEART AND SOUL"

Has anyone felt this deep sorrow of the heart and soul?  Have you felt like you do not know how much more of this pain you can take, a sadness that goes all the way to the core of who you are, a pain that cuts at your heart day and night, one in which you find yourself weeping inside all the time at that it does not take much you make you cry outside as well?  Yet you know you have to continue to work to stay in your heart, grounded, balanced and at peace no matter what happens, to more deeply just stay in the present moment and take one day at a time.  As we grow, we must learn to deal with any amount of pain.  The focus is to grow to become better, more mature, more confident in who we are in our lives, to find a surety within ourselves that we know why we are here, and know what we are supposed to do in life.  The path we take to find this surety is winding and has many turns.  Often we find that our feet are at a crossroad.  It is only in the deepest stillness that we will find our direction and our answers.  It is from this deeper stillness I am seeking to find my direction and answers for my path.  What I express I do so from a transparency and openness of heart and soul!  I also feel that what many of us are going through in this deep Anguish is more in a deeper connection to our world, the earth and the transformation of humanity!  When it is time, we will know what it is we are to do, each of us!

As I have found a deep healing in my body and my pain level has decreased, down from a normal ten that I was in all the time to a normal two or three now, I feel like I am twenty years old and not ninety years old!  The deeply painful things I am going through in my life all around have taken the pain more deeply to the heart and soul, to the emotions.  Yet with all of this, I know everything happens for a reason.  What am I to learn, what are we to learn, from such deep anguish?  It is easy to tell someone you just have to let it go or walk away from it and stop crying, stop grieving!  I know from when I almost died from pneumonia, when my mother died, when my children left me, so many deeply painful things, that it is not so easy to walk away and just let these things go.  I have three main areas in my life where I have been going through such deeply painful things.  I relate it to the death experiences I have had, for it is the same anguish of soul I went through in all these losses, ones in which I had no control over the events.  I had control over myself and how I responded to the losses and sorrow.  This is part of the key to growing and overcoming the sorrow.  This is part of what I had to learn from all of the losses.  Now I find the same thing going on and I am working to turn it all to the positive by how I respond to the circumstances presented to me.  It is how we respond that makes all the difference.

I know I am not doing perfect in all of it.  I have my really good moments and then I have my really difficult moments, as I think each of us does!  I believe when I make a promise it is from the heart for me!  I do not ever make a promise lightly!  If we take a vow, this is a serious thing to do before the Divine!  When we promise to love someone forever, to me this means just that; Forever.  People break these vows and promises so easily today.  For me a vow is sacred, so is a promise!  So what do you do when other people walk away from your vows and promises of love and commitment when nothing in your heart has changed, meaning you still love the other person and you are still working to keep your vows and all your promises.  What do you do?

Well first, you really do have to let go and release the other people.  You have to allow them to choose their own path in life!  It is one thing to know about the path in life!  It is supremely another thing to walk this path on a daily basis no matter what is thrown at you; to love, to forgive, to be patient and compassionate no matter what happens!  This is the test of the path of the Divine life!  I know I have not been perfect ever in my life, but I do make a 100% effort every day in every way I possibly can to do my very best.  This is all we can ask of ourselves and other people, that we make a genuine effort all the time!  There is no time off from working to live with integrity, honor and compassion!  There is no time off from being responsible and trust worthy in a relationship!  So if you or I do not make the effort to respect and honor our relationship and commitments, it is very difficult for it to be a healthy relationship.  It is very painful as well.  If we cannot make a simple commitment to our father, mother, children, husband, wife, family, friends and partners, then how can we ever begin to heal our world and truly save humanity?

So what do you do when you find yourself in such Anguish and pain?  I am finding I have to just take it one moment and one day at a time with my heart continually working to grow and become more mature, to allow the divine to work into my heart and soul the necessary compassion, patience and tenderness to stay in my heart no matter what happens in life and not to judge anyone at all!  Am I there 100% of the time?  Absolutely not, but I know I can be and I know I will make the daily effort to become this living being of limitless compassion!

We are each on a different path.  We each have our individual focus in this life!  I feel our many lifetimes have brought us to the pinnacle that the world is in today at this moment!  It is extremely important that we all wake up and see past all the illusions the world has created before we destroy the earth that has given us so much life!  It is the time of the great awakening of humanity!  This is truly the deep Anguish of heart and soul we feel!

With tender compassion!

"LETS BE REAL"

What does it mean if someone tells you, you are a very real person? What does it mean for us to be real and genuine from the heart? Do we know how to be real all the time? I was talking to a dear friend today and this was the topic of conversation. People are always wanting and needing to put labels on things and people so they can understand, or just to judge in a negative way. As you know me by now, most who are reading my articles I always speak from my heart. I am tempered in what I share seeking to bring healing to everyone who comes in contact with me, in one way or another. But this is who I am, I work to stay in my heart all the time. I do not put on a mask and pretend to be someone I am not, when I am sad you can see I am sad, when in pain you see the pain. No matter what is going on inside of me I try to stay in balance and keep a positive outlook on everything I am learning.  I am deeply connected to the Divine but I stay away from religion and religious attitudes. It is these types of attitudes I am speaking of that I find are so damaging as a whole.

We can say we believe a certain way, profess a certain religious belief, we can be a lawyer, a doctor, a politician, it does not matter. The point is simply that what we live and what our actions are is who we really are inside. It does not matter the mask one may wear, in time people will see behind the entire mask and see who you really are.  We can pretend to be more mature than we are, we can pretend to care for others, we can pretend to be nice and sweet. But the reality is it takes so much energy to wear these mask and to live a lie! That eventually we slip and people begin to see the real you! This is why it is so important to seek the purity of love and compassion; it is through these deeply Divine virtues that we find the power to overcome our weaknesses. 

I have said in the past we have to conquer our egos and find the humility to live with compassion and not be selfish! But I want to say in this process we simply need to mature and not allow ourselves to be selfish and hurt each other! We have to be tender and compassionate with ourselves and each other! We are not to look at our self as we are bad or good, negative or positive! We are a living Divine soul who is growing and becoming more mature. Yes we have negative things we need to change in ourselves, but this does not mean we are a bad person. It simply means we are still a child needing to grow and mature. We need to show ourselves compassion as we grow. The more we do this the more we will be able to do this for the ones we love and the ones we meet each day. It is never good to be hard and cold. We are human we are going to make mistakes! Just do not make excuses for these mistakes and keep making them over and over! Work to be real and make the changes within yourself that is needed so we can become a world of maturing souls and bring a balance, harmony, peace and compassion to our daily life!! We all need these tender virtues above all else in life!

We have to learn to accept our weaknesses and learn to improve them; we are in a time of transformation energy at this time in life and the whole human race! We have to learn to look beyond our faults and the faults of others, to love each other even with in our own weaknesses! The pure energy is here to heal us to mature us in every way on every level. It is for each of us to choose to embrace or to choose to reject! We have no one to blame but ourselves for the current state of our lives and the current state of the world. So if we will each choose to be real with ourselves and the people around us, live with some humility! When we are wrong let us admit when we are wrong. We need to change let us humble our heart and make the effort to change! I have found this is a key Virtue of being real we have to walk each day seeking humility as well.

For myself I have made so many mistakes in life and I see so many deep fears, insecurities and Faults that I still need to grow and mature past. I look back and wished I could have always been as soft as I am now. But the reality is I personally always put a 100% effort in to living with honor and respect for everyone. I have always just been me at whatever level I was at, that point in my life. Wearing mask has never been a part of who I am or who I was, so I have had to just be true to my heart no matter how much other people would tell me you cannot be honest and be so real all the time, this is not the way it works in life! Well I disappointed a lot of people because I would not go alone with all the lies and illusions. But I have remained true to my heart and to live with integrity, honor and compassion. These are the goals I focus on, and I trust the money will be there in my life for what I need when I need it. Working a job of some kind is good and we all need money to live. But I cannot and will not make money my primary focus and goal in life. To focus on restoring true honor, integrity, love and compassion to this world is my complete goal! I do this it is my focus for me to be filled with this in my own heart so each and every word I speak and share. Everyone I touch in life feels the energy of love and compassion is real! Am I perfect no, but my goal is not to be perfect, it is to be mature according to the standards set by the Divine Compassion!

So let each of us focus on what is real, what brings healing, what brings change to our lives and change to those around us, through the Divine Healing Compassionate energy of pure love! Drop all the mask and take a deep look in the mirror face our Faults and make the effort to transform into the souls of compassion we each can be!

Seeking a deeper compassion!

With much Aloha!

"WHY DO WE GRIEVE?"

It is a natural process to grieve in life when we have losses of many different kinds, but why do we grieve so deeply at points in our lives and what does this grieving process actually accomplish in us?  I have seen that many people run from grieving and block it simply because they do not want to feel the pain and most of us know it can be deeply painful depending on what we are grieving about!

When I was young, as most people, I did not understand grieving.  I did not know what it was.  I think we as children have an understanding of sadness, mostly when we do not get something we want or desire, but I know I was around ten years old when my great grandmother died and a few years younger when my great grandfather died.  I felt a loss and missed being able to see them, but I did not grieve over the loss and feel the pain that I do today!  As I am writing, I can see we have to be of a more mature heart to feel the deep grief and pain that comes with the loss.  If we hold it in and deny ourselves the release, which is a part of what grieving does, when we hold all the pain and sorrow in, it becomes a poison to our body and turns into cancer or some other illness.  It also affects our hearts, minds and souls!

I know for me it is creating a deeper capacity for compassion.  It is making my heart more sensitive and tender.  At the same time, we have to deal with depression and discouragement.  For me, these all seem to come hand in hand.  When I find myself in a place of deeply grieving over a loss in life or many losses in life, I seem to have a battle with depression and discouragement.  I am not one to sit in these things but it is good to allow the grieving process to work through your heart.  I am not going to sit with discouragement and depression.  I push myself to get out of it.  But it can be a deep battle in life.  I know I have gone through this many times.  It is energy like anything else and we have to conquer it.  Some people just say, “Oh, get up and walk away from it.  Stay busy!”  Well we really do not learn how to conquer the energy by just staying busy now do we?  I agree we have to move forward and work to create positive energy to replace the negative energy.  At the same time, we have to look at what the root of the depression is?  What is at the root of the discouragement?

For me at the moment, it has to do with the deep losses in my life and that I cannot change them.  I have to accept the losses and move forward.  When it is your children or the person you have come to love more than all else in life, this is simple not so easy to move forward and to let go of!  For me as a father, my five children meant more to me than all else in life!  I came to see that when I was so sick with pneumonia and almost died, it was the thoughts of my children that continued to give me the will to live!  Then two years ago when I met the woman who my heart so deeply loves, this became a huge part of my life and joy being able to have what I have longed for all my life, a love that goes beyond the mind to the depths of the heart and soul!  Now I am having to completely refocus my heart to let go of the people that gave me the greatest joy in life, to grieve the loss and get back up, to work daily to move forward without any of these people in my daily life and to accept not having any contact with most of them.

Thursday is my birthday.  This year I will be fifty.  Last year I spent it alone.  This year I worked not to spend it alone.  A good friend wanted to have a party at their house for me on the day of my birthday!  Nice big smile, I do not have to spend it alone!  (LOL)  They had to move the party to Sunday!  I am smiling today as I write this, for the Divine seems to be truly dealing with me on every level so that I am ok being alone with myself!  I was not smiling about this yesterday.  (LOL)  I was sad about it.  I am not a person who enjoys being around crowds of people all the time, not even very much, but I am also not one who likes to spend most of my time alone.  I am not interested in being a monk on the mountain any longer!  (LOL)  This is what I used to want to be.  My heart has changed since I was younger.  I think this desire to be a monk was from my past lives as a monk!

The grieving breaks us open and allows us to get in touch with the depths of our heart and soul!  It allows us to see what we need to change for it helps us to find the core and essence of who we really are; the good, the bad and the ugly as they say!  It is the process of opening up that can be painful as well.  It is like we are going through a deep birthing of the heart and soul.  It is not just one of us but the entire planet and every soul living here at the moment.  We can continue to swim upstream and fight what is happening in our lives or we can embrace it, learn, and grow from it.  I see myself daily growing and becoming more accepting of my path and what I have to learn.  I can see I am daily becoming more patient, tender and compassionate, which is the whole goal of what we are to learn and become.  Some can say I am just not in touch with my true self and this is why I am enduring so much emotional pain.  The goal is to mature and find a freedom from much of this emotional pain, but I have found it takes time and we do not grow up overnight in our hearts and souls, just as we do not grow up overnight in our body!  We learn that this pain is on such a deep heart and soul level, it is way beyond what my mind can follow or even bear.

There are certain energies I have found that are very difficult to completely conquer and I do remind each of us it is all energy we have to learn to obtain victory over.  Death comes in many forms.  Loss comes in many forms.  The pain and sorrow that comes with the losses in life does not just go away.  When our heart is as hard as a rock, we do not feel these things much at all.  I remember when my grandmother died.  I was nineteen years old.  I had made my heart hard so I would not feel pain.  I also decided to do this when I was thirteen years old and crying, thinking life was so painful I would end my life.  I told myself, if this was what it felt like to cry, I would never cry again.  So when my beloved grandmother died when I was nineteen, I could not shed one tear.  It was then I knew something was deeply wrong with me!  I worked to change this.  Now if I need to cry, I do.  I want to feel all the joy and love in life!  We just have to remember there is also pain in life we will feel as well.  When we lose someone who we love, it is a natural part of being real, that we are going to grieve and process the loss.  I am learning some losses are so much deeper than others, so the grieving it not a quick process!

I know there are many of you in the same place as I am.  This is why I feel I am to be so open and transparent.  We are taught it is a weakness to cry, grieve and feel sorrow!  I do not agree.  It takes real courage and strength to embrace these things and not run from them, to process them and release the pain and then to be able to move forward!  Even now in the midst of what I am going through, I have great times of joy as well, for example, my birthday.  I am looking forward to see what life has planned for me.  Alone or not, I intend to enjoy my birthday!  We have to learn to embrace life and all it has to offer, even the times it is painful, and learn from the pain the lesson it has to teach us!

With a big smile as I finish!  For me, I have found it is in sharing in the sufferings and joys of life and other people as well that we fully become alive, TO LIVE!

With a joyful heart!

"OVERCOMING FEAR & DOUBT"

There is a reality many people are faced with each day.  Their health is bad or they are dying.  Then there are millions of people who are faced with a lack of money to pay the electric bill or the rent!  Someone recently shared in a comment on one of my articles that they felt most people teaching today were sitting in complete comfort, not understanding at all what the common people were going through and what they were struggling with!

When I was very ill and close to death, on several occasions I had many well intending people say to me, “Well, you just have to have the faith and believe God will heal you.”  Then in times when I have been struggling with money and was not sure how to pay the rent, the electric, or the gas bill, people would tell me the same thing.  Well, you just have to have faith and believe the money is already there!”  I can tell you from my firsthand experiences in both areas that there is a fear factor we have to deal with.  This fear can be horribly paralyzing!  When you are faced with death or you simply do not have the money to pay your rent, it is not as easy as telling someone, “heal yourself” or “money is just energy and you can create it just like anything else!”

Many share these things with good intentions, having gone through the same things.  I know when I was very ill, I did believe I could be healed.  At the same time, I was able to help other people to be healed.  So it was difficult for me to understand sometimes why I could not heal myself as well.  It was very humbling!  There was a big lesson I needed to learn; to live with true Humility!  Then I also learned everything happens for a reason.  Each lesson in life has a purpose.  I heard from my heart very clearly in 2011 that if I would leave everything I loved and worked so hard for in Texas to come to Hawaii, I would find complete healing!  I also felt very clearly that if I did not leave Texas I would not live much longer.

As I followed my heart and moved to Hawaii, I have in fact found the healing I was promised!  At the same time, it has been costly to me economically for many reasons, plus my added costs here.  We are all learning and growing!  I do not feel these difficulties are anyone’s fault, just what we are all needing to learn!  Since I have not been in Texas to manage all the businesses, we have suffered some difficult losses.  Yet at the same time, I have total peace Maui is my home at this point in my life and I am not to go back to Texas.  This is where the faith and believing does come in!

For me to be healed took all the belief that I had, but it also took a lot of hard work on my part.  It was not an instant healing.  I found my healing one day at a time, one step at a time!  Changing my eating habits and exercising, but the greatest was shifting my energy to a higher vibration to become more pure in my heart and soul!  I began forgiving everyone who had hurt me and forgiving myself!

What I want to address here is more the fear that you face at points and times in all this.  The type of fear that can make you deeply ill, sick and vomit!  A fear that can take days and months to conquer!  Then with the fear comes a voice of doubt!  I have been on both sides of the fence as they say.  I have believed for years for myself to be healed and it did not happen.  I only got worse!  Then I have believed for the money I needed at the times in the past.  I always had money for food, but there were times I lost my cars or trucks because I could not make the payments.  I lost my good credit more than one time.  I lived in a car for a long time!  But we have to face the fears and conquer them, the same with the doubt!  For those who have gone through these difficulties and others in life, you know what I am talking about.  The fear and doubt can be very painful!  It is very real!  For those of you who have never experienced anything of this nature, please be careful not to judge what you do not understand!

I am sharing this today for many of us are going through some very difficult times in many ways.  I get a lot of feedback from people reading my articles!  Some of us are fighting to pay the rent.  Some of us are fighting to be healed.  Some of us are suffering from a deep loss of a loved one.  If you are really going through all of the above, then wow.  We have to dig deep to stay calm and in our heart and not to allow fear, doubt or panic to take over!  Yes, these are all energies we have to conquer!  We have to find courage to face our fears!  We have to find calm in the midst of the storms of life!  We have to work to maintain balance and grounding!

Since I was say eighteen years old, I have spent a great deal of time in prayer and meditation.  Now, as I will be fifty years old next week, I work to stay in a mindset and state of constant prayer and meditation.  Even when I was young, I spent a lot of time alone.

I find when things get really tuff and very intense, I do not even get much sleep.  Over the past week, I have found my nights full of deep prayer, that I am not sleeping much but staying in that meditative state I am speaking of.  I have many people ask me, how do I stay at peace?  How do I not be afraid?  How do I stay calm?   My son-in-law Seth asked me the same questions for many years over and over!  “Aaron, how do you stay so peaceful all the time no matter what happens?”  I am better at this now than ever in the past!  My answer was always the same!  I would tell him, “It takes Great effort and discipline each moment of the day and night.”

I have found nothing Good in life comes easy!  This has been my experience and the experience of most people I know!  Good to me is the blessings of the heart, love, compassion, friends, family, and then the material things we need to live and be comfortable!  It is like any athlete.  If they do not practice and train hard, they cannot win or achieve their goals!  I have found our spiritual walk is just the same!  We have to work hard to live with compassion, create purity in our heart, stay calm, balanced and focused!  For me, everything in life is there to teach me how to become a better person, to become wiser, more balanced and let go; to Surrender more deeply to God!

So to be clear, I am not sitting back in a place of complete comfort sharing all of these messages.  I am going through a deeply difficult transition in my life!  I have to work so hard each day to stay in my heart.  I lost my mother and father in a short period of time, losing my Mom in 2010.  I left my family in Texas to come here to follow my heart and become the person typing these words.  My health is much better but I have to work each day to stay that way.  I lost the person who means more than anything else to me last month.  I am going through a super tuff time with finances, and at the moment I have no idea what my immediate future holds.  I understand deeply what it is like to be surrounded by the storms of life.  With all this said, I still say we have to stay in the moment!  We have to spend time feeding our heart and soul, just as we do our body!

We cannot give into fear, doubt, or worry.  It is all a waste of our life force!  How do we find victory over these things?  One moment and one step at a time!  Sometimes Baby steps are all that we can do!  Other times, we find things moving very rapidly!!  One of the Greatest things I learned from seven or eight very near death experiences was this: “NEVER GIVE UP.”  I learned to surrender to God but also to Never Quit or Give up my fight for life or victory over the forces working to take away my peace, Faith, and confidence!

My being here alone in Maui is forcing me to grow so deeply to bring myself to a much higher Vibration of light and love!  I know there are several of you going through some really tough things right now!  Just remember, do not lose hope!  It will get better and you are not alone!  We are in this together!!

Sending Hope & Trust,

"THE HEART OR THE MIND"

As I have been sharing my heart, I welcome all the responses I have gotten from each of you!  Sometimes we each tend to think, “Why I am going through so many difficult things in my life?”  We feel like we are all alone in what is happening.  I have deeply learned to trust my heart in every area of my life, including what I share in each article.  As I have talked with many of you, I am reminded we all are going through many difficult things in life.  We are not alone for the planet is in a deep time of transition, shifting from one phase to another.  I have been in this shifting process for many years now.

One thing I have learned and I am more deeply learning today is not to live in my mind and all the thoughts that I have to shut out, but to each moment live more deeply in my heart and follow the deep intuition of my heart.  We have gone through a long difficult time in so many areas in our life.  I speak of my family who works with me in all the businesses in Texas, also in our personal lives as well.  It has been a deeply difficult transition for everyone that I no longer live there to help everyone each day, but I now live in Maui alone!  This has also been very difficult on me as well.  I feel my focus has been shifted from all the businesses I have done in the past to a 100% focus on my writings, teachings and healing work!  I really have no desire to work in the business world anymore, so I am working to turn everything over to the people in Texas who started everything with me and to get to the point where I am no longer involved at all in the companies.  In the next couple of days, they will take my picture off the website for the ranch and replace it with a picture of my son-in-law and my daughter.  They will be completely taking over the ranch day by day.

Gradually we have been working on this for the past two years.  There has been a lot to take care of.  This will daily help me to turn my focus to 100% healing work.  I am going to open my heart to doing readings for people who may desire for some guidance in their lives.  It is fairly easy for me to see into people lives in the past and the future.  I have written six books that I have been working on to share.  I have had many people ask me for them.  It is difficult for us to ship them all over the world so I have come to the place my heart I truly desire to help people more than anything else.  I have found a way to upload my books online.  I have already started this but anyone will be able to download them and share them for free!  I had hoped this would be a means of income for me, but I feel led to let that go and just work to help as many people as I possibly can!  I will have a PayPal link set up on my website so if anyone wants to help me with this work they will be able to donate to our work.  This is part of following my heart.  I share over and over life is not about money!!  It is about helping as many people to find the heart of compassion as possible.  We all have to put our ideas and beliefs into action, for without action, we just speak with empty words.  I have already shared all of my books but one on my facebook page.  As soon as it is all in place, I will do so again.  Then I will begin to share the rest of them on all the groups I am sharing in on facebook.  Please feel free to share them with as many people as you like.  I am still looking for someone to translate them into Japanese for me as well.  If anyone would like to translate them into any other languages, please just let me know.

The energy we are moving into is one about service to humanity.  Please do not get me wrong.  We all need money to live.  We all deserve to be paid for our work!  This is all a lot of work for me and I know in due time I will be fully rewarded for all my hard work but for me it is still about spreading the true essence of love and compassion, to spread the Divine power to help others to heal, to grow and to mature.  The reward does not always have to be in the form of money!  Here is an example.

I have received many invitations now to come to many parts of the world to hold conferences and classes to teach, but I have absolutely no funds to do this.  For the work to grow and for me and other people to travel, share and do a deeper healing work, we all have to have the funds to accomplish these things.  I know many have been deeply disappointed that I have not said yes and gone to their country, but it is a simple illusion to think just because someone lives in America that everyone here is rich and can do anything!!  I have always found that many people in other countries think all Americans are rich and have a lot of money!!  This is simply not true.  For all of my adult life, it has been very difficult to make a living and pay the bills.

It is true there are very many wealthy people here but this is just a small percentage of all the people.  Most, like me, have a hard time paying the electric, rent, car payments, insurance payments, taxes; the list goes on and on.  Now we are supposed to buy medical insurance, which is just crazy to think of all the cost.  So for me, I am in the position most people are in life.  It is like day to day, pay check to pay check.  I completely understand what it is like to be tight on money or short to pay the bills.

We all have to trust that if we follow our heart, then the funds we need for each project will be there when it is time, like for me when I know I am supposed to start traveling from country to country.  Whatever I need will be there.  For me, I know it is not time yet for me to go out from Maui.  I am here in Maui for a reason, so I will give and help however I can until it is time!  There is an old saying, “We make do with what we have and make it work.”  Do not complain about what we do not have but rather be grateful for the blessings we do have!

Sending many blessings of the heart!

“SPEND ONE HOUR IN HIS OR HER SHOES”

It is so easy for us as people to judge and condemn what we do not agree with or what we do not understand.  I have experienced this all of my life, being judged harshly by people who do not agree with me or understand why I live as I do or why I believe as I do.  When I was less mature, I was doing the same thing.  Today I work really hard to not judge anyone.

I started posting in groups on facebook about five months ago, sharing my articles as I write what I feel in my heart for that day or moment.  I have received over five thousand responses, possibly more.  In all this time, I have only gotten one very negative email.  They did not post it for others to see, they just tried to cut me up in a private email.  Being received so positively by so many people is very new to me!  For so many years, I have gotten a great deal of hate, anger and rejection from people simply because I feel we are all accountable to a divine love and compassion!  I am one to stand up when I believe something is wrong and I will not go along with it no matter who gets upset or what it costs me personally.

I do not feel it is ok for any of us to just do as we please in life and hurt the people around us for selfish motives and desires.  I feel we all have a responsibility to the rest of the world to share our time, energy and money to help others and work to improve our world.  Part of this is for us to learn not to judge other people so harshly with our words, our attitude and our actions.  I have found when we are deeply judgmental, we only bring this same negative energy back on to ourselves!  We create the same negative attitudes, thoughts and actions we so severely judge other people for.  It is easy to tell people what they should do and how to fix their problems and their life!  But there is the old saying, “Do not judge a soul until you have walked a mile in their shoes.”  For me today, I was thinking about this.  I have some very difficult situations to deal with and work through in my life at the moment.  Many of us do!  I am not feeling sorry for myself by any means.  I am just working to resolve the difficulties to the best of my ability, to hear clearly what direction I should go and not to force anything just because I am in a difficult situation to get out of it.  The easy way to say it would be, “I feel like I am in a pressure cooker!”

Today has been so intense that I have been fasting with no food or water, which I find to be a tool that helps me to stay calm, balanced and grounded in even the most trying of times.  But it is not easy at all to fast with no water or liquid of any kind!  We may have a few people who are upset with us simply because we will not do what they feel we should when the reality is we may not be in a position in any way to make the changes they want us to make, nor do we feel it is the right direction to go.  However, the anger sent our direction is supposed to make us go along with their idea of life and to make us feel bad or guilty in some deep way!

This is where I had the thought, “I wish they could just spend one hour inside of me to see what all this feels like!”  I do not mean it in a bad way, but just so they could see and feel how intense it is and how painful it is and has been for many years.  Pain is nothing new to me, not physical, not mental or emotional.  I have lived with great pain all my life in one form or another!  This has helped me to learn deep empathy with other people.  It is easy for me to feel the pain, sorrow and difficulties in other people.  It is easy for me to feel this when I connect with someone on the other side of the world.  I can feel their heart and their inward thoughts thousands of miles way.

So in all this, there are days I feel like an absolute mess, battling fear, worry, doubt, anger, sadness and so many other negative energies!  The reality is, who are you or I to judge anyone else!  For me, I honestly feel I have to work so hard on myself to stay balanced, peaceful, grounded and in the heart of compassion!  It is only my place to seek to love and serve other people, not to judge them for what they cannot do or what they should do!  The more compassionate we become, the more pure we will be and the stronger we will be!  True strength is found in gentleness!!  We each need to be shown tenderness and compassion, not to be cut to pieces and judged because we do not meet someone’s opinion and idea of who we should be and what we should do in life.  Then for us to go deeper, for us to simply love these souls with purity of heart toward those who do not understand our path in life.  Our heart may be different and we may not be like most people.

We have to learn to be more accepting of other people in life and not to be so harsh in our opinions.  It is this universal compassion and acceptance of others we need to learn to embrace!  For me, I need only look at myself honestly and see I am a work in progress with a long way to go to become the deep soul of compassion I desire to be!!  In this thought, we have to give mercy to get mercy!  We have to give forgiveness to get forgiveness!  We have to give compassion to be shown compassion!  Let us seek to be tender even in our thoughts with ourselves and toward others!

It is in brokenness of the heart and soul that the seeds sown of tenderness and compassion will find root to grow!!

With tenderness of heart!

“SURRENDER TO THE DIVINE”

We have to learn to live beyond the mind and surrender to the Divine completely!  I have spoken little of God recently in my writing, but I find a need today to share this is the connection that brings us face to face with Life!  I have found there is a great price to be paid for Divine enlightenment and maturity!  To find the great treasure of patience and wisdom, it seems we must give up the things we value the most in this life.  Each step of the way, as I have desired deeper compassion, humility and wisdom, it has come at a price of someone or something of great importance to me.  I now find myself in a place of seeking deeper wisdom for my life to now understand what it is I am to do with my life.

I feel I am being constrained by a divine power, a force, making me be so still inside and outside!  I spent three hours this morning doing yoga and meditation at the beach, feeling the waves and wind washing my heart and soul, listening for the answers I need to bring my heart to a deeper peace and stillness.  So many thoughts, fears and worries want to flood my mind and take away my peace and calm as I think I need to do this or that, as I feel a longing for someone, as I feel a regret or miss someone so deeply.  I just feel this great Divine energy reaching deep inside of my soul and telling me not to follow these thoughts of my mind but rather to go deeper inside of myself and reach deeper into the well of wisdom, peace and harmony that is completely connected to the Divine to God!

I have a dear friend who has been hurt so deeply by religion and people who are very religious but have no compassion or love, that she is so deeply offended with God that I cannot express my heart in these areas at all with her.

In every book I read, in each teaching I find on this spiritual path, I find one common thread!  It is, “That we each have to completely surrender to the Divine God.”  For me this is a given.  I have lived this surrendered life to the Divine for thirty plus years knowingly!  When I look back at my childhood, I see the hand of God leading me, protecting me and teaching me each day!  Many of you have emailed me and asked me how to find a deeper peace, how to let go of the pain, how to open your heart to love and compassion more!  I do not believe it is possible to become balanced, mature, enlightened and filled with compassion without the connection to the Divine!

I find so many days that I am asking for help, that I do not know how much more of this pressure I can take; the stress in life, the deep losses that I am fighting daily to let go of!  I have had to leave all my family to follow the path of my destiny.  I have had to let go of the one person I found a divine love with that is the most powerful connection I have had with another soul in this life!  It all comes down to this one thread of truth!  We each must come to a complete surrender to the Divine!  I have had to let go of those who were not yet ready to make this surrender and divine purpose and priority in their lives.

For me, it is simply seeking a deeper connection each day, to let go and surrender my heart more deeply to faith, love, compassion, wisdom and all such virtues!  I feel myself being constrained by the Divine in such an intense way.  I feel my heart, mind, body and soul being drawn into a place of inner stillness beyond anything my mind can comprehend, having to shut out all thoughts of my needs, money, emotions, relationships, everything.  It is like I am being called deep into this cave of virtue of the Divine.  The fires of purification are burning out the deep hidden aspects of my Ego I cannot even see.  This is why it gets unbearable.  When I have all these thoughts of what I should do or desires of pleasure that I do not need, conflict being thrown my way trying to draw me away from this deep place of stillness, I can feel this invisible hand just gently holding me still saying do not get caught up in all the fear, worry, drama, and conflict.  Just be still and Know I am all you need.  The love I have felt all these years from the Divine is what has kept me moving forward, kept me wanting to grow and change!  It is a love, forgiveness and compassion that I have found in nothing else of this world!

I can feel I am being further isolated unto the Divine essence!  I can feel myself being made more solid and more stable in the ways of love and compassion!  It is not what we think with our minds, unpurified and self-centered, that will make any positive difference in our lives or the world around us.  It is rather what we manifest from the realm of the spiritual world that is fully living with the divine healing energy and life force!  It is when you and I are willing to give up all we love in this world, all we truly care anything about!  It is then we are flooded with the Divine power and wisdom to be a servant to bring true healing and wisdom into the world we live in!  As long as we worship the material world and the vanity that it offers, how can we truly find our place in the Divine love and compassion?  We cannot!  I welcome the comforts of this life and enjoy being warm and having a good meal, but I have also come to see that the riches and luxuries of this world can be a trap and prison for the heart and soul!

More than all else, I want to be free to grow in the ways of the heart, to be free to love and bring healing to others!  One of the greatest burdens I feel in life right now is for Japan and all of what is happening there at the present moment, yet I know the only way I am able to help at the moment is to continue my growth with the Divine to overcome all fears and gain the power to bring healing without any limitations, even from Radiation or any other negative creation man has brought to life!

So dear ones, it is in the stillness of our prayers and meditations we are going to find the strength to walk in the world of conflict around us!  The whole purpose of the awakenings going on in so many people today is to bring such a great shift in each of us to a higher vibration so we can save our planet and not bring it to destruction!  I can tell you as many of you have shared with me also.  The waking up process and feeling the energy all around you can be so very painful that you feel it in your body as physical pain!

To me and for me, I find all the wisdom, love, compassion and healing in the surrender to the Divine!  It is only in this love I have found with the Divine that I find the strength to walk in this world, for it does take strength, which is found in compassion and being Gentle!  May we each find our changes in letting go and jumping into the Divine Ocean of compassion!

With much Aloha!

“THE YEAR OF RELEASE!”

For me, the past two years has been a place of deeply letting go of the life I had before I moved to Hawaii.  In 2009, I felt I was going to leave Texas and go overseas sometime soon.  Then, in October of 2010, I felt led to buy my suitcases so I could leave Texas.  This whole time I was preparing the people who work with me to take care of the companies I have back in Texas and also preparing my children for a time when I would no longer be there close to them.  Then in January of 2011, I felt very clearly I would be leaving Texas in September of 2011.  Up to this point, I only knew I was going to be flying over the Ocean.  I had thought of a few places; the Philippines, Japan, or a few others came to my heart like France.  I simply did not know yet.  I was investing all of my money back into the ranch to get it ready so I could leave.  As a result, I had no money to travel!  (LOL)

Around July of 2011, I finally knew I was going to Hawaii.  I began researching and making plans.  I also felt I was going to meet a Japanese woman when I got to Hawaii.  At some point around the middle of August, I was able to book a hotel and flight for three weeks in Honolulu.  I left Texas on September 21^st, 2011.  My plan was to go to Maui if I did not feel led to stay in Honolulu.  Five days before my time was up in Honolulu, I met a beautiful Japanese woman just as I had felt I would.  I had also felt like I was going to go to Japan after I met the woman I was waiting to meet.

Six days after we met, we did go to Japan.  We spent ten days in Japan.  While in Japan, it was the first time in my life I felt at home anywhere.  We came back to Maui and spent almost two years together.  On January 1^st of this year, we were on top of the Haleakala mountain here and I felt led to make a dedication that this was a year of releasing everything in my life that I needed to so I could move forward in my work as a healer and teacher of the heart of compassion!  We shared an amazing two years with each other and my heart has been deeply broken with our parting.

You may ask how I knew all these things before they came to pass.  Well this has been my life since I was young, seeing things and knowing things before they would happen.  It is very easy for me to see into other people’s lives, into their future, or into their past, but for my own life, it is so much more difficult to see clearly and to get my own mind and ego out of the way; to daily surrender to the divine compassion that so deeply guides my heart!

I am in the process of letting go of many things in life.  The hardest has been my children.  Some of them felt they did not need a Father any longer so this has been deeply painful.  The other ones struggle that I am not there close to them to help and so do I!  The other most painful part was the woman I feel so deeply in love with.  Letting go of this depth of love is a completely new experience for me!  I know I was brought here to Hawaii for many reasons, the biggest to heal my heart and my body.  I feel if I had not followed my heart to come to Maui that I simply would have died.  This is how sick I was!  Another reason was to also prepare me more deeply for the next part of my journey, which I believe is to move to another country; Japan, Thailand, Bali, India or one I do not know of yet!  I am in the process of turning over all my companies to the people who have helped me to develop them.  We have been all meditating on this for at least three years now.  I feel for me this is the next step in my growth and in letting go of the old life and embracing the new life.

We have been searching for an investor to finance the purchase of the companies but we have not found this yet, so I am simply following my heart to sell them without an exchange of money and trust for the money we need to come.  There is debt that needs to be paid, working capital to grow, and I was looking for a down payment so I would have money to start fresh in my life wherever I am!  However, running true to my deep focus on the mountain January 1^st of this year, I am going to release everything regardless of the lack of funds I would really like to see to do this.

I am going through the same thing now in my life here in Maui as I did when I was waiting to leave Texas and I did not know where I was supposed to go!  When I feel deeply connected to my heart and at peace, I feel so clearly that I am going to live in another country soon!  I have to grow and trust that the funds I will need for all of this will be there when it is time.  I am daily working to let go of my children and the one woman whom I loved more than all else in this life!  Letting go of the life I knew in the past completely to focus on a life to share the reality of compassionate living in this life!

I have found my passion and desire in life!  It is to work daily to help people to find the true passion, compassion and freedom in life to love, be loved and be truly happy!  This is all found in letting go of the Ego and the Mind, not focusing only on money in life.  Yes, we all have this need, but our only plan cannot be to get, gain and gather to accumulate monetary wealth!

What do we do when the direction of our lives changes so deeply we do not know anything familiar?  For one, we have to let go and let the Divine guide our footsteps!  I know there are many of you who see things in your heart.  If you find you see something for me in regards to direction in my life, please feel free to email me!  We all need help at times!  What would we do if we could not see with our eyes, if we were blind?  We would need the help of other people.  The reality is, no one can see all the turns or changes our own life may take, so release life and let it flow!  Release the things you are hanging on to.  It is then we can truly see what is meant to be and what is not!  Then, we can completely find and follow our destiny!

May this be our year of return from our releases!

With compassion,

Aaron 10-9-13

“HOW LONELY CAN YOU BE?”

I had a friend share with me a couple of days ago that they always feel a deep loneliness.  They have felt this way all of their life!  This was nothing new to me.  I have felt this same deep loneliness all my life as well!  She asked me how to deal with this?

I really feel it depends on the degree you have this reality in your heart!  For me, even when I was married and with my children, I would still feel so deeply lonely.  I can be surrounded by a crowd of people and still feel so deeply lonely!

On only two occasions in my life have I ever felt at peace so deeply that I did not feel lonely.  Both times were when I had met someone and fallen deeply in love.  This last time was just recently, over the last two years.  When we were apart, I would feel this deep loneliness, or when she was so busy with work that we did not get time together.  Now that I am alone again, I am having this deep battle with loneliness.

What is the answer?  How do we get past feeling so deeply alone at times?  For me, this is one of the very things or one of the energies I am working to free myself of at this time in my life!  I honestly do not know the root of this but I feel it goes into past lives!  Also, we as humans tend not to like to be alone.  Some people really like to be alone, but I am not one of them.  I do not need crowds of people but I do want a deep intimacy to share with people, an intimacy that goes way beyond the mind and is deeply of the heart and soul!

As I found with the love I recently lost, this is what I desire more than all else in life, to share this deep compassionate love and intimacy with another soul!  Is this the answer to curing the sadness and loneliness that causes us great pain?  At some point I may have said yes!  But with the meditation I have been doing and the fact I am spending approximately 80% or more of my time alone in meditation and seeking direction and answers for my life, I would say no.  We must find complete peace, harmony and balance inside of ourselves!  Then as we accomplish this, we may still have that same desire for someone to share our life with and the deep desire for intimacy!  It seems each day as I am working through the hidden difficulties in my heart, I am feeling more confident in myself that there is a reason I am alone in my life at the moment!

For having felt so lonely all my life, I can see so many reasons why this was the reality I faced day after day.  I think we all have this deep rooted issue in life we have to conquer.  Each may be different, but we all have issues.  The question is, will we face them and bring the healing into our soul or will we deny them and continue in the same negative patterns in life?

I see one root to the loneliness is caused by rejection!  I have suffered a great deal of rejection in my current life from people who I am the closest to and those who I have loved the most deeply.  None of us like to be rejected!  For me, I am just working to forgive myself and others, to simply accept this time I am being given to work on my own heart and heal I hope completely!

If you find you are having this struggle of feeling deeply lonely and you have felt this way all or most of your life, then I feel the answer is found in us accepting the circumstances of our life and then working to open our hearts to a greater healing energy and compassion!  The love, healing and compassion first begin with ourself!  I have had to work really hard not to be so hard on myself!  My parents were very hard and very hard on me so it has taken time to free myself of this energy from them.  I am learning to be more patient with this healing process and growing process I am in.  I keep wanting it to be over so I can move forward with my life!!  (LOL)  But this is my life right now and I am being given a time to heal and I am working to share this healing with other people through my writings!

I have broken and conquered so many negative patterns and energies in my life.  I have come to see this as just one more thing to gain victory over!!  As I write this, I feel for me the answer to being free of the deep loneliness is found in searching my heart; searching for peace, purpose and what is my greatest passion in life!  From finding our passion, I feel we will find our purpose in life!  Then from this, we find the wisdom and courage to always face our fears, defeat them and then move forward in life!

This is one of the things I am working on right now, to face my deepest fears and to conquer them!  Over the years I think one of my deepest fears has been to be alone!  Now I have the opportunity at this point in my life to work through this and find peace.  This work is also to find the deeper grounding and harmony with my higher self!

Do not focus on the feelings of being so lonely!  Let us focus on the act of purpose, meditation and finding our true passion in life!  After many years of searching for my true passion, I feel it lies within helping the world and other people to truly heal and find their purpose, to be able to share compassion, wisdom and understanding with others to work to make our world a home for the compassionate heart!  Honestly, I find nothing else that drives me or creates a burning fire in my heart more than the passionate romance with the Divine purpose, to live in loving kindness and share this from the actions and expression of our souls!

There is a burning fire within our souls that nothing but the true fires of love will ever satisfy!  With the fires of passion, the loneliness will simply fade away!

With much tenderness!

Aaron 10-4-13

“HOW DO WE FIND HEALING?”

With every word I speak, it is from my own life and my own experiences in life!  It is not something I have read in a book but lived in my daily life. 

As a child I had many traumatic events in my life.  One of them was getting scaled with burning hot coffee at fourteen months old.  I spent six weeks in the hospital and was wrapped up like a mummy, burned all over my face and upper body.  I witnessed healings as I grew up and heard about them in my younger years.  My grandmother was a healer.  Anytime any of us, my cousins or I, got hurt or were sick, she was always laying hands on us and healing whatever was wrong.  I could see the healing energy and I knew I had this ability as well at a very young age.  I have matured and taken this beyond what I saw with my grandmother and beyond the scope of religion.

I have had around seven near death experiences now in my life and I feel this has opened me up a great deal to the healing energy and understanding of what we need to find in life and for ourselves to be healed.  When I was thirty-four, I got run over by an eight hundred pound cow.  It was around 1998.  It broke up my neck and back greatly, destroying my nervous system.  I have also had pneumonia five times.  By 2006, I was walking with a cane and was in the condition of an eighty year old man.  I could not lift more than three pounds.  I could feel death close to me all the time.  Then in late 2007, I slowly began to find a little healing.  This change in my health has all been due to changing my life, my heart and my energy.  I also found as I was able to bring healing to others that it was due to being able to shift and change the energy in their heart and soul to a more positive base.  I found I was able to connect to their subconscious and help them to release the negative energy that was causing them to be sick in whatever form.

From my own experience, I have come to see all the sickness and disease in the world is due to negative forces and energy we store up in our heart due to our education and lies we are told.  It is also due to the karmic seeds we may have sown in past lives or this one.  If we want to be healed, we have to believe it is possible and make the effort to gain the healing.

The more I daily purify my heart and soul, the more I fill myself with compassion and mercy for myself and others, the healthier I become.  I exercise daily and eat healthy foods.  I do meditation and Yoga.  I attribute my healing to all of these things and my search for wisdom, healing and the divine purpose in life.  I would say I am about 90% healed from where I was before.  You can visit my facebook page and see pictures of me before and after.  Just since September 2011, I have come a long way.

One thing I do see is that many people want to be healed but are completely unwilling to make the changes in their lives to bring this about!  I have completely changed my life in almost every way since 2011; the way I eat, the way I walk, exercise.  I moved to Maui, Hawaii, from Texas.  I not only wanted to live a long life and be healed but I felt I needed to find healing myself.  This I have conquered and as a testimony, so that I could more effectively help others to heal!

One key to healing is to purify ourselves of all the negative energy we take into our heart, simple things like anger, jealousy, envy, and greed, to work to have even pure thoughts as well as actions.  It is like running our car.  If we put dirt into the oil or the gasoline, then it is going to damage or destroy the engine in our car.  It is the same for our body.  If we fill it full of negative energy, such as anger, then we will soon find we have cancer or some other deathly illness!  What we eat or what we do with ourself in so many ways is very important too.  We cannot just use and abuse our body and then expect it to be healthy!  We cannot fill it with poisons and then wonder why we are ill!

I have had many testimonies of this in my own life to see people release and let go of the negative energy that has them chained up in their heart and then they would be healed.  It has been the same for me personally.  Finding forgiveness for me and other people in my life is when I would see a deeper healing in my own body.  Sometimes it would be immediate, or the next day, or over the following week.  But my getting better has always worked with me opening my heart more deeply to love, compassion and forgiveness!

All of the pain and affliction I have suffered in this life to me has been used as a tool to create the compassion and healing energy that I find in my life today.  I believe what I know now and who I am now has been developed over many lifetimes.  I believe no matter what a person has or what disease you may have, anything can be cured.  It is a matter of searching out the roots of negative energy growing in the heart and soul and then working to remove these negative roots, being willing to do the work to resolve the actions in our Karma that have created our present circumstances! 

I have been feeling this is something needed in our world today.  Healing is not so difficult if we are willing to look at the reason we are ill from a deep standpoint of the heart and soul as well as our past karma.  It is truly about resolving this conflict and karma.  Yes, we can heal anything in life!  I do not put any limitations on life, healing, wisdom or growth.  For me, this is what I am working on in my own life, to understand these things from my own life and then to devote my life to helping others to heal and resolve the pain, conflict and karma that has created our affliction.  With this in mind, let us open up our hearts to the healing we can find with the true power of pure compassionate energy and without all the medications and the operations!

With much hope in our future!

Aaron 9-28-13

“THE LOST VIRTUE OF HUMILITY”

In all the years I have been awake and searching for truth, wisdom, and compassion, I have not really ever heard anyone speak much about the depth of what is missing in our world, to take a deep look at why people are so bound up in the selfishness of the ego.  Yes, this is where the world is at in our evolution.  We are stuck at the moment in the lust for power and wealth, fortune and fame.  I have also found a very limited amount of books or anyone really teaching much on the subject.  So what is it we are in desperate need of to begin to heal and heal the world around us?

Well, in thought and one word, it is easy to say!   “HUMILITY”

I will try to take it beyond this and try to explain it in simple terms so we can get an idea of what we are seeking and needing.  Possibly I can share some of what humility is not.  When we just think about what we want and our own desires in life, we do not know Humility.  When we always have to be first and our priority is our self, when we constantly boast of what we are doing in our lives or how we are helping other people, when we find the need to be the center of attention all the time or even part of the time, then we still have not taken Humility into our hearts and souls.  When we lack sensitivity to others and hurt the ones we love on a daily basis, when we have a passionate lust for money, power and fame, when we are lost to the greed of our ego, we still have not come to know the Path of Humility!

Humility: 1. The quality or condition of being meek and modest in behavior, attitude, or spirit.  Humility is the foundation of compassion.  Without humility, there is no place for compassion to build upon.  Without a proper foundation, no house would be able to stand.  It would simply collapse. It is the same with compassion.  Humility is one of the most important elements in all this.  Compassion cannot grow or develop in any way without the necessary foundation of humility.  To be found without pride, ego or any negative energy, we must first learn to let go of self and selfishness.  In self, we find nothing but pride and ego.  This is where our desire to be a servant of compassion must come in and take over, for us to learn it is far better to serve others and seek to be a soul who devotes themselves to compassion than to be selfish and simply be devoted to our own ego!

I know for myself I have gone through so much brokenness in this life to create the foundation for Humility to find a place in my heart to grow from.  To me, if I were to say I am a very humble person, then I do not yet understand the essence of Humility.  For the moment, I would say this.  I have stepped into the realm of Pride and Ego!  Now if I were to say that I am seeking the path of humility and working to allow this to take over my heart and that I am seeking to become a servant of compassion and for humility to be the essence of my heart and to become a soul of in-depth compassion, this would be a simple truth that is a reality to my heart.  I believe becoming a humble person is a daily work in progress just as becoming a soul of compassion is also a daily work in progress!

As we begin to give our lives over to the life of compassion and humility, these virtues begin to take root inside of us like an amazingly beautiful tree!  Little by little we begin to change and allow this tree to grow and blossom.  We can be honest with ourselves about who we are.  We can admit when we are wrong and need direction.  We can hold our tongue and not speak unkindly to others.  We become a very teachable soul!  The people who know everything and have all the answers are found to be the most lost souls, not yet having crossed paths with Humility.  Or if they have at some point been introduced to Humility, they quickly rejected the need for it.  For myself, I am working each day to take to heart and embrace this virtue of humility more deeply.  I do not want to make the same mistakes today as I did yesterday or in my past.  I want to be found with the humility to learn and grow each moment to be able to be of a profound help to our world!

I have an unbelievable burden each day for the human race to grow past the conflict of killing each other for power and wealth, to grow beyond wanting to dominate each other and say one race is better than another!  If we are able to find this true Virtue of Humility and let it become real and living within each of our souls, we will then come to see the world around us and other people as living breathing souls in need of tenderness, love, compassion, mercy and all such attributes.  Being Humble does not mean we are a doormat for people to abuse.  It means we will not do any abusing of other people and we will become consciously aware and awake to the reality of the deep need for compassionate living in this life. 

There is a need for all of us to seek out this lost Virtue of Humility, for us to explore the limitless oceans of truth love and compassion that are bound up in the essence of Humility!  Honestly, I find this one of the hardest subject to speak about yet I also find that Humility is one of the greatest things we each need to learn and be taught!

I have met many teachers in this lifetime, teachers of so many different beliefs, so many religions, meditation teachers, yoga teachers.  The one thing I have not yet truly found in a teacher in life is one with a humble heart or one with deep devotion to practicing a life of Humility as well.  I feel that there may have been some that have started out with some humility, but as soon as they got the first book or became well known, the rise of the Ego takes over.

Now please hear my heart in this.  I long to meet souls who know and understand the need for this compassionate life of Humility!  I feel this longing in other people as well!  I feel this search for humility in many who send me emails and are connected with me in one way or another but what I have not seen is a soul who is truly Humble!  I have read about some who have passed from this life.  I have heard stories of simple people who live a life with a Humble attitude.  However, we need this as an example in our Philosophers and teachers today.  This should really be one of the first qualifications of any kind of instructor of the heart and mind!  I am not saying this Humility does not exist in some teachers today, I am just saying I personally have not met anyone with such pure and deep Humility.

So with great Hope, let us all seek out this Lost Virtue and put Humility at the foundation of our spiritual and daily lives!

With the desire to walk the path!

Aaron 9-23-13

“HOW DO WE DEFINE MATURITY?”

How we define maturity many times is according to our lack of it!  We accept very low standards of maturity just as we accept low standards of integrity!  How do we measure maturity from a healthy realistic view?

What happens much of the time is people choose to live in illusions so they can do as they please in life, creating harm to themselves and to others in many ways.  Also, if we live in illusions, we can always pretend everything is okay when in reality it is not.  We are not happy and do not want to deal with the problems we face in life, thus we have all the alcohol, drugs, and addictions we face all around us in this world.

I hope to break through some of the illusions people have created and simply state what I have grown and come to see as becoming a soul who is living with wisdom, compassion, and maturity.

As we grow, we can get to a point that we do not live from our emotions, where no matter what happens in life, we stay calm and in harmony with compassion and love.  We no longer get angry, jealous, or bitter.  We no longer try to dominate, control or manipulate other people.  We choose to allow people to make their own choices in life and we honor this!  We do not get our feelings hurt and react in a negative way to the situation or the person. This true maturity is not based on our culture or the rules of conduct from the country we grew up in or may now live in!  This deep maturity of the heart and soul is based on a much higher standard than any culture is going to teach us at present!  As we mature, we come to understand deeply that even our thoughts never spoken to anyone need to be pure and that there is a completely just law of Karma that brings any negative action or thought to harvest!  This means simply that we create our life from our own energy, thoughts, and actions.  As we work to resolve the conflict within our own soul, then we can resolve any past karma.

As we mature, we become a deeply compassionate soul.  We become responsible in our actions, thoughts and daily lives.  We stop blaming others for our own negative behavior and we choose to change anything that is harmful to us or anyone else!  We will truly become a soul who will do no harm to anyone or anything in this life around us.  We will also become responsible with money and take care of our needs in life.  It is a balance we will seek to achieve in all we do.  I do not believe true maturity has anything to do with how much money we have or do not have.  I have seen very poor people and very rich people who are deeply immature in every way.

As we mature, we will awaken to the true state and condition of the world around us and ourselves.  As I grow, I have come to see I am just a child who is learning something new every day and that there is far more to learn each day than I already know!!  It is like the ocean or the universe we live in.  What we have to learn is so vast, we cannot begin to take it all to heart in just one lifetime.  It takes many lifetimes to become a mature soul.  I have shared it like this.  For example, let us measure our maturity by a glass of water, a gallon of water, a five gallon bucket of water or a fifty-five gallon drum of water, each showing that we are more mature as we gain a larger container of water.  Let’s say we meet a soul that you or I may think, “Oh, he or she is so wise and mature.  They must be like five thousand gallons of water, so deep so mature.”  But here is the reality of this life and what we have to learn.  You can take any of these containers of water, and when you dump them into the Ocean, what do you have?  Nothing!!  It is all lost into the vastness of the Ocean!  The point is, no matter how much we have learned, nor how Mature we have become, there is a much greater vastness of love, compassion, and humility we have to ingest into our heart and soul.  For me I find it is like a daily awakening and that I am just now really beginning to understand what life is really all about!  It is a daily humbling to see when I mess up and fail to stay in my heart and not get emotional about something that is really bothering me and to always remember never to wear a mask to pretend to the world we are something better than we really are!  It is not about saving face!!  It is about living in reality all the time, to never create an illusion that we have to waste so much energy to maintain all the time.

I have found a great deal of becoming mature is to take responsibility for our lives and who we are, and make the effort each moment of the day to become the best soul we can possibly become and to “NEVER MAKE EXCUSES FOR NEGATIVE BEHAVIOR,” to set our goals high, but real. For me, it is simple.  My number one goal in life is to become the most tender, compassionate, loving soul I can possibly become who can stand with integrity and honor in all I think, say and in my actions, also without bringing harm to another soul.  This is my focus each day.  At the same time, to love life, to live life to the fullest and enjoy each moment, to never take life or anyone in my life for granted and to always appreciate everything life is giving us! 

I could write a book on what maturity is but I think this can at least begin to answer the question, what does it mean to become Mature and live with wisdom.

Seeking maturity is a way of life not just an idea!

With compassion!

Aaron 9-20-13

“SEEKING MATURITY”

For the past couple of weeks, or years I could say, I have been learning a love that in every way goes beyond what my mind can comprehend or endure.  So many times I find myself in tears because it hurts so much, like today.  So many days I find such sorrow in my heart that I just have to be still and let it work into my soul what it desires.  One thing is to be real always.  I do not believe in putting on a mask and pretending for the rest of the world that everything is okay, especially when I am really hurting about something in my life.  Living in denial does not help anyone, nor does living in self-pity help either.

It is easy for people to claim to know and have all the answers, that they can fix your life or mine.  I have found so many people are very quick to tell me what I should do with my life or what I should not do.  One thing I am learning is that I am but a child in the universe of life.  We are all just children learning one moment at a time.

Today I cannot think of a title for this article.  Usually this comes first and then I know what to write.  Today I am working to express my soul from a deep place of pain and sorrow.  I am working daily to find the purpose of all the pain we as humans suffer in life.  Some say it is only that we are disconnected from our higher self and that is what causes this pain.  I believe this may be true, but finding ones deeper meaning and deeper purpose in this life can be so difficult.  Sometimes it is that we fear what we are really to do or possibly we have not matured enough to see exactly our true purpose in this life.  For me, I know what I want to do is to more deeply share with others how to live within the heart all the time and be a true expression of compassion, forgiveness and help to shift the energy in the world from the darkness we have to a beautiful place of compassionate living.

The patience it is taking for me to be still and allow this to develop in my own soul is like me seeing the outer limits of the universe from my chair here in Maui.  Two factors actually, faith and patience.  It is so deeply foreign to our mind to take in the deepest realm of the heart and soul.  Most of the world is caught in the material realm and has money on the mind.  I know I have spent many lifetimes in the east as a Yogi and in the temples in Japan and many other places.  We have to fight to break through all the doubt and muck that surrounds us to keep us from the harmony and peace the spiritual life has to reward us with.  This is also easy to say when you have a lot of money to make life easy and comfortable.  But when everything around you is difficult in many areas, it is much more difficult to live in peace and harmony!!

I have let go of and given up many things in this life that I love very deeply and so completely, so that I could pursue the things of the heart and compassion.  What it boils down to is, what is the priority of our heart and soul?  I have watched so many walk away from the life of the heart simply to keep themselves comfortable in the material world and material rewards. 

But it is in the heart we will find true happiness!!  We must find peace, compassion, love and humility inside of ourselves first and above all else.  This is what we really have to conquer, our own human weakness, to become that higher being we really are.  To see we are here to learn to love, to learn to express compassion, to learn to deeply connect with the other souls in this world who desire this beloved INTIMACY of heart and soul.   Not to be afraid to express our heart in actions and words!

It is only as we make ourselves VULNERABLE to compassion and other people that we will find this happiness of heart and soul.  We each need a healing from all the wounds of this life as well.  We also have to be willing to let go of the aggressive nature that we carry in our egos, to be gentle, tender and kind with ourselves and everyone else in life!

For me, I am on the path and make no claims to perfection, but daily seek to become the higher being we are all capable of becoming, to work towards maturity!  So as I come to a finish in this, I think this is the title to this article, “SEEKING MATURITY”, for this is what we as a human race are in desperate need of, deeply mature souls to lead us into a future of harmony and compassion to realize that we are all the same deep inside.  We have the capacity to deep compassion or deep selfishness.  We each can have this harmony, compassion, and peace.  The question is, are we willing to put the effort and work into accomplishing this in our lives?  Are we willing to devote our life to the maturing of the world around us?

With a deep purpose to become Mature!

Aaron 9-20-13

“THE CONDITION OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE!

Part 2: BREAKING FREE”

Over all we are such sensitive creatures!  I have felt for at least twenty-five to thirty years now that I was trying to break out of a shell, like a baby chick has to work so hard to break free of the shell it was born into to become the creature it is now growing into.

It is all about compassion and being able to live in the depths of compassion both for ourselves and for other people as well.  But the problem is, I find that from the time before we are born, we are taught all the limitations of life as to why we cannot fly, why we cannot walk on water, or why we cannot stop our aging cycle.  Why, why, why and so many people work to force all these limitations on us, all the cultural limitations from each country!  There are all these limitations and rules from laws and from religion, when all we want is to roar like the Lion who is free in the wild!  We should always respect all the life around us, but I know I am working to break free of the cage everything of this world builds around us from the time we are conceived.

All my life people have been telling me why I cannot have the love I want in my personal life.  Very few have ever been positive as to agree that even what I want is possible.  What is so difficult about two people loving each other completely with respect, harmony and honor without the man or woman trying to dominate each other?  I am at the point in my life I refuse to accept anything else but this deep true love, but I have also given myself permission to have all my relationships to evolve around this deep love and compassion.

I have had some deep awakenings the last few days as I have made choices not to allow my close relationships to be filled with drama and conflict and not to allow people to keep me from the goals that I know I can accomplish that are real and realistic.  Just because another soul is caught in the conflicts of this world does not mean you or I have to be caught in the same way of life.  We have to grow beyond this lower level of life.  We have to evolve and raise our hearts and souls out of the dirt and decay we see all around us, not only to refuse to be caught up in the conflicts of this world in the outside of ourselves, but to completely “BREAK FREE” of the internal conflicts inside of our hearts and souls!!

I have awakened to see and feel such a harmony and peace awaiting me, as I break free of the shell of the Ego and lower nature of mankind.  When we love another soul so deeply that we cry for them night and day, we miss them with each breath, how do we let go?  It takes great discipline and effort to daily choose wisdom and compassion above all the desire of our heart!

For me personally, I feel I have been given this life to share this freedom and in depth compassion with others.  But If I do not learn this first hand for myself, then I will be like so many others just sharing from a book they have read or a lecture they have listened to.  This has to be so real inside of you and I that this tenderness and compassion drips out of us like honey from a honey cone.  It is not enough to just talk about love, forgiveness and compassion.  We have to be so full of it that is just flows from the very core of our being so that people can feel the transforming power of our words when they read what we write.  Where these words can jump into your heart and change you because they are full of the wonderful power of a compassionate soul.  Each day we have to work to break free of the darkness and chains that hold us back!  We cannot let our love for others be used as a chain to dominate us or keep us in a cage!  We each have to fight with all of our heart to be free to fly and to be free to express the true compassion of the Divine soul inside of you and I, not to ever compromise what we know to be right and to be the truth we must  “BREATHE BY.”

We must break free of all the crazy limitations people and the world place upon us like chains to suck the life out of us.  However, we must do this with compassion so that we never intentionally harm another living soul.  Let us seek to be free to love not only ourselves but also the world around us!  I see it is deeply letting go of our selfish desires and working to serve humanity in whatever form we may do so.  This does not happen overnight.  As I have said, I know I have been consciously working on this for thirty years now.  I have always seen this process as Breaking free of the shell to connect with and become the Divine soul we are already deep inside.

With the deepest tender compassion my soul has to share!!

Aaron 9-12-13

“THE CONDITION OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE: PART #1”

Today I want to talk about the love between a man and a woman.  I find so many couples have trouble in their relationships and give up so easily.  You have to have several things in line and important to both people to have a healthy relationship that will work and last forever, and I do mean forever.

I personally believe in a love that not only lasts all of this lifetime but with such a oneness of heart and soul that you will come back to find each other for another thousand lifetimes, that your love and bond is so strong!

I have several friends I know who are going through a deep difficult time in their relationship.  One relationship where both have cheated on each other, one where one partner is into drugs and alcohol deeply, and one where they love each other so deeply but one person is so independent that the relationship always comes last.

So how far does our love go?  How far does forgiveness go before we give up let go and move on?  I can focus on one of these relationships and really describe all of them.

When you love another soul more than you love your own, you cannot just give up and walk away like your love has stopped!!  I find this to be the most difficult part; to love someone so deeply that you feel lost without them, yet both of you have not matured enough yet to get past the differences you have!  I did say both of you have to mature.  It is never just one person who is completely at fault!

What do you do to grow through the pain and trouble?  I have found it is like you have two strong countries who are both independent!  They both have very positive qualities and very negative qualities!  For this example, let’s say they are America and Japan!  The person who grew up in America will feel they have the most positive qualities and that they do not need to change as much!!  Then here is the difficult part.  The person who grew up in Japan will feel the same way!  Both are needing to see the positive in each other beyond the negative, but both learning to be honest about themselves and their countries to love past the weakness of our human soul!!

I grew up in America and I have been to Japan and know many Japanese people and have many Japanese friends!  Both are wonderful countries and have many wonderful people!  We just need to see we have to take the best of both and forget the rest!  We cannot learn to become one heart if we remain so independent!!  We have to always think of how our attitudes and actions will affect our partner!  We must never knowingly do something in our daily life that will damage our relationship with the man or woman we love!!  We must learn to put the love we share and this relationship above all else in life!  We can only expect as much back in love as we are willing to give ourselves!

I have done marriage and couples counseling for thirty years now.  I found that the only ones that work are when both people are willing to put their love first!!  Usually only one person is working at the relationship!  This will always fail!

So the real question in any relationship is, are you willing to put 1,000% of your heart and soul into the relationship??  Then is the other person willing to do this also!  When both of you will do this and you have the connection of heart and soul, nothing can be more rewarding in life, absolutely nothing!!  But until you find this deep devotion from another soul, it just leaves you broken, sad, lonely and empty!  So the question is dear soul, do you really want to love and be loved in this lifetime??  If you do want this deep love, then you have to put the “EFFORT” into the relationship each moment of the day!

If we will truly put love and compassion in our life as the first priority, then all else in life will build upon this!!  It is up to you and I to make this commitment to ourselves and to love!!  How much do we really want this love with another soul?  For me, it is and has been my #1 goal and priority in life, finding the one soul to share my life and love with!  How many of you are willing to put love and compassion above all else to completely devote yourself to this awaking and to this life?  To me, this is all I care about in life.  I want nothing else more!!

When we truly each desire this burning love more than all else, the world around us will very rapidly transform!!

With the love and compassion to transform!

Aaron 9-9-13

“QUANTITY OR QUALITY?”

I have been faced with this for many years in so many different ways and areas.  What is more important?  Is it the Quantity of friends and family we have or is it the Quality of our family and friends that really matters?  I have also faced this question many times as a spiritual teacher of compassion, honor and integrity.  Which is more important, to have thousands of students and followers or to have only one hundred, fifty, twenty or five students to share your heart with?

With my son being here, I am again reminded of the Quality of a relationship to be of the greatest value!  We each must choose in life if we are going to base our values in life on the quantity of our gathering of wealth in material possessions or if we are going to measure our life on the deep Quality of our own character of heart and soul, as well as the quality of character of those we have in our close circle of friends, family and students we choose to share our time with.

The quality of our time is of great value!  Yitzchak, my son, was here for six days and I would have loved for him to have stayed ten days or more, but the value was not in the Quantity of days and hours we spent together, but rather in focusing on the Quality of each moment we had together.  This time was to me a great treasure I will long appreciate in my life.  It is the same for me in every relationship in my life.  I do not choose to have many people in my life just to say, “oh look how many people who follow me or oh look how many friends I have.”  I would rather be able to spend time with a man or woman who deeply values the expression of the heart and soul in the form of tenderness, kindness, mercy, honor, loyalty and above all deep Compassion.  To me, without these Qualities, we are lost and have nothing much to offer the world around us.

This has been my focus in life for more than thirty years now.  In October, I will be fifty years old.  I am now reaching a point in my own life that I feel I am just now beginning to understand my true purpose in this lifetime, that I am just now beginning to really understand the purpose of “LIFE ITSELF.”

It is not about what we get, gain and gather in worldly possessions unto ourselves but rather who we become within ourselves in life that is of true value.  This has become my complete focus, to find this deep Quality of life and to be able to share and teach others to do the same, that true love, peace, harmony, and compassion for life is of the greatest value above all else.

We first have to be willing to make ourselves very vulnerable to people in life, to tear down all the walls we have built around our hearts to protect us from the pain in life.  We need to realize we would not truly be able to see or appreciate the Quality of life if we did not know and feel the pain in life, then releasing all our pain and allow healing in our hearts.  My time with my son was a very deep healing time I believe for both of us.

For me, I continue each day to focus not on how anyone else needs to change but simply on how I can grow and work to become a deeper and more mature soul of tenderness and compassion.  The only regrets I really have in my life are that I wish I could have been as soft, compassionate and tender at twenty years old as I am now at forty-nine, to have known at a young age what the real Quality and value of life is.  This is not something anyone can go back and change, who we used to be.  But we can improve and change who we are at the moment.  We can become a more compassionate and tender person today, tomorrow and each day in the future.

We find the quality in life when we realize any problems or difficulties we have in our life are not other people’s fault to blame but rather an opportunity for you and I to grow, to fully accept responsibility for who we are right now at this moment and then who we will become today, tomorrow and every day in our future.  Sometimes quantity is very good but I feel only if it is found with true Quality as the foundation.  To have thousands of true friends who put love, honor and compassion above all else and truly practice this in their daily lives above all else, this would be most amazing!!

So let us each seek to create in our lives this most amazing Quality of compassionate living above all else!

With much Love and Compassion!

Aaron 9-6-13

“RESOLVING CONFLICT”

I have been giving deep thought to the topic of “resolving conflict” as of late.  It seems to be the greatest lesson and work I need to accomplish in my own life!  It is also the greatest need I see in the world around me.  I have never met one soul in this life who did not have a great deal of conflict in their lives.  Ninety-nine percent of the time, this conflict was and is self-created by each individual soul.  Most people cannot simply have a calm, grounded, peaceful discussion about anything.  They get heated, irritated and anger gets involved.

I personally grew up in great turmoil and conflict.  I worked really hard to resolve this so my children would and could grow up in a more peaceful environment, which they did by far from what I grew up in, but they did not really accomplish what I wanted for them, a conflict free environment.

First let me say, I know some people reading this will say this is not possible.  Well I disagree.  It is possible to accomplish this with a lot of hard work.  It is when we find a healing inside of our own soul that we will not get caught up in other people’s drama and conflict.  It is like this when we go fishing.  We can only catch a fish if the fish will bite the bait on our hook.  Any good fisherman knows the kind of bait we need for what kind of fish we want to catch.  You have to have the correct bait, correct time, or correct place to fish.  These factors play a part in getting the fish you want.  It is the same with people.  We all have these trigger buttons inside of us that other people can instinctively push and then we are caught in the conflict and drama.

What I am still working on personally is when someone tries to bully me and make me do what they want or try to intimidate me with strong aggressive energy, that I don’t get hard and fight back.  This goes back to when I was a child.  The bullies would always beat and pick on me simply because I was so gentle and did not want to fight back.  I was also a very small boy until my tenth grade year of school.  I grew nine inches in nine months to complete my 6’2” frame I have now.  I seem to still draw this type of conflict and probably will until I resolve the pain and anger inside of myself for what the bullies did to me as a child.  I have gotten to the point I feel I do not do anything to create conflict in life, but I have not gotten to the point completely that I do not bite the hook when it is placed in front of me with the correct bait, correct time and place.  It does take all three of the correct things to get to me and push the buttons inside of me.

We just have to keep working to resolve the pain and conflict in our own soul.  As we do this, then we will draw the same harmony into our lives from the outside that we feel on the inside.  It is only me who can “CHOOSE” to resolve this inside of myself!  This is the same for you and anyone else.  Nobody can do this work for us.  Many people can help us in this area, but only we can choose to forgive and let go of all the conflict within our own souls. You will notice I put the word choose in capital letters, for it is a daily choice to grow and mature.

The next step in all of this is to put forth the “EFFORT” it takes to accomplish this, for it does take a lot of effort.  I have a friend that has known me for nine years now.  He lived in the same house with me and married my oldest daughter.  We have had many discussions on life and what it takes to stay grounded, balanced, at peace and in harmony with life, to live from our heart with compassion.  He asked me how I did this, stayed at peace, so consistently each day.  For several years, each time we would talk he had the same question.  My answer was always the same.  It takes great effort, focus and discipline each and every moment of the day and night.  For me, it is my paramount goal in life. 

I had another friend ask me in 2011 what my goal in life was.  In this was a simple answer for me; “to become the most tender, compassionate loving man I could possibly become in this lifetime.”  They were really asking my goals for money in life, but I truly feel if I will focus on my real goal of compassion, then whatever money I need in life will be there when I need it and for what I need it.  I am finding a deeper peace in my heart each day as I work to resolve the conflict with in my own soul.  Most people are so caught up in conflict they cannot even think of a life any different than one full of conflict and drama.

What we each must ask ourselves is, “is this life of emptiness and conflict what we really want and desire?”  Then we must make the effort to change all of what we can to bring about harmony into our own heart and soul.   Then and only then can we really help anyone else.  Think about this one thing.  Why do we run away from compassion, harmony, peace and love, and then turn around and run into the arms of conflict?  It is this dysfunctional wounded part of our soul that we need to bring healing to.  Once we have done the work to bring the healing to ourselves, we can then embrace true compassion with peace and a grateful heart.  I know for me it has not been an easy work to accomplish. I have several people who are helping me and many who are trying to keep me in the conflict.  So let us each focus to bring harmony and compassion into the world around us by bringing it into our own heart first.

With much compassion!

Aaron 8-26-13

“LETTING GO ~ NOT KNOWING”

The world is in a deep period of transition!  Governments are being toppled, the world economy is in the danger zone, and the earth itself is in an upheaval.  That is a message to all of us that we must change our present course.

For so long the human race has been on a path of selfishness that is now affecting everything around us.  We need to then take this to a personal level for you and I as individuals!  I know so many people who are seeking direction for their life not really knowing what to do.  I will use myself as an example.

I have been here in Hawaii for almost two years now.  I have grown so much and found such a wonderful healing for my heart, soul and body, yet I am still seeking the direction for my life.  I am not sure if I will remain here in Maui or if I will be leaving to live in another country.  It requires deep patience to allow ourselves and our life to develop in a natural flow.  It does not help anything if we force the events in our lives.  I see so many people in life just ignore all the road signs pointing them in one direction or another.  Then when things do not work as they planed, it seems to them that life has dealt them a bad hand.  For me, I know all things happen for a reason.  Right now I am working to learn to be more still, calm, patient, understanding, compassionate and forgiving, none of which I could have begun to understand two years ago when I left Texas.

I have started a new chapter in my life.  Many people are doing the same thing, starting a new chapter in their life!  For me, I seek to fill this chapter with only love, compassion, and wisdom, not to make all the mistakes I made in my youth.  Some days I find my heart filled with sorrow and tears for some of the things I have had to let go of.  Letting go of people I love so deeply to move forward is one of the most difficult and painful realities of life that we all face at times.  Sometimes we have a path to follow that is lived more alone at times.

Around eight or nine years ago, I met a man that was a seer.  He told me that where I was going in life, the people around me would not be able to go!  At first I did not see what he did.  Now all the people I love so deeply in life are not with me here in Maui.  I find myself alone seeking the direction of my life.  I have some ideas of where I am headed but I am working to simply find peace in the “NOT KNOWING.”  This is sometimes the hardest place to be, simply living in the moment and not knowing what tomorrow is going to bring.  Being alone is also very tough at times.  For twenty years I was surrounded by my children and completely devoted to them.  Now I am learning to be happy with just me!

I have some ideas of what I may do, but nothing for sure.  Can anyone relate?  It is called a life of faith in some circles.  But it is reality of life when we let go of all the illusions of control, for we really have control over very little in life.  As we mature we can find a peace just to live in the present moment and follow the path of our destiny, to find Harmony with the world and creation around us, to find our perfect fit into this world!

Focusing to find Harmony!

Aaron 8-19-13

“MOVING SLOWLY: YUKURI!”

As we work to become balanced, grounded and focused, to live from our heart, there is a key element that helps so deeply.  How do we move?  How do we eat?  How do we talk?  How do we walk?  How do we brush our teeth?  

We are taught that we have to do everything quickly and in a rush.  We are always moving very rapidly in life!  Everything has to be done rapidly…rush, rush, so we can be someplace or move on to the next task.  We must make ourselves move much more slowly.  As we focus on grounding, focus to open our heart, focus to make our mind still, we need to brush our hair slowly, eat slowly, and drive slowly.  Leave early for everything.  Give yourself time to smell the flowers or see the sunrise and the sunset.  Do not rush through life and miss everything!

We live in a fast paced world and do not take the time to enjoy life.  It is impossible to be grounded and racing through life at the same time.  Practice this in your daily life.  Start with brushing your teeth in the morning, drinking your coffee, or eating your meals slowly.  With each breath you take, make an effort to slow down your life and live in the moment.  Learn to live in this present moment, not yesterday, not tomorrow, not one hour ago, or one minute in the future.  Just live for right now!  By making yourself live and move more slowly, you will find a deeper peace and harmony in life as well as the ability to stay and live from your heart and not your mind!

Most people are moving so fast, all they see is themselves and what they want!  We have to look at how we affect other people in all we do!  It is as we take time to slow down and look at life in reality that we will come to see we are a part of a much larger family.  It’s not just you and me, but the many thousands of people that we directly affect.  Will we slow down to see the reality of life or will we keep racing ahead only to drop off the cliff into the deep dark hole of negative reality, where we only focus on ourselves and what we want?

Let us look at the world as a family that is in need of attention, which we can only give if we are moving at a pace to see it!

With a gentle movement of the heart!

Aaron 8-15-13

“Living With Loss”

There is a part of life most people just want to avoid.  We each suffer losses in many ways, like when our family members and friends die.  This can honestly take years for us to overcome, the grief and sorrow of losing someone we love deeply.  Then we have the loss of someone special when they choose to move in a different direction in life or we lose our partner in a break up or divorce.  Then we could have a situation in which our children or a child has decided to disown us and cut us out of their life.

If we are really going through a deep and difficult time in life, we may find we are experiencing all of these things at the same time. At this point we begin to ask, “how much more can I possibly take?”  Well we learn to bend and not break.  We learn to let go and not get caught in the conflict.  We learn to love more deeply and more unconditionally.  I have five children from ages twenty-two to fifteen years old.  At the moment, my three youngest do not have any contact with me and this is deeply painful for me.  A pain I honestly feel each and every day!  Their reasons are easy for them to see and feel, but in reality for me, I just have to accept the choices they have made and release the pain and sorrow as I can each day, to send them love no matter what!

Then we add into this the loss of a relationship with a wonderful amazing person that means more than any you may have had to date in life.  We cannot force anyone to do anything in life.  This is not love!  So how do we deal with all the tears and pain we feel inside when we are suffering these losses?  I lost my father in 2007, my mother in 2010, and several close friends during this same time, plus I had pneumonia and almost died myself!  For me, the past several years have been a lot of learning how to feel the pain and sorrow of loss!  We must feel it when it comes up, and then let it go after we cry and release it as we go!

Loss of lives, friends and relationships is a reality in life.  So is the pain we feel during these times!  Pain, compassion and love all come hand in hand.  If we cannot feel great pain, then we cannot feel great compassion or great love.  We cannot run from the pain and sorrow in life!  We must learn to embrace it, feel it, own it, then let it go and keep moving forward in life.  We must face even the most painful situations head on with wisdom and maturity.

As we heal, the pain becomes joy and we remember the good things we had with the people we lost.  Let us appreciate all the good moments we have in life with those we love!  You never know when they will be gone or when we will be gone.  Let us cherish all the beautiful moments we have with everyone in our lives!

With much Aloha!

Aaron 8-12-13

“Gratitude”

When we get quiet in life and learn to listen, when we take time to listen to the sound of the birds singing and the wind blowing in the trees, to smell the flowers and see the life all around us, we begin to develop a deep gratitude and appreciation for life.  But as we learn to listen, we also begin to hear the people around us more clearly.  As I listen to the sounds of their words and feel the energy they are projecting, a lot of times I feel myself very sad at how lost some people are into the negative side of complaining about everything and not appreciating the positive things they have in life.  Instead of focusing on all the beautiful things we have in life, some people tend to just focus and complain about anything they can find.

I found some of my deepest awareness about appreciating life when I had so many near death experiences.  I have come very close to death about six or seven times now.  Most were long drawn out illnesses, so it was months of not knowing if I would wake up the next morning when I went to sleep at night.  A few were quick brief experiences, but the feeling was the same.  Each time I saw more clearly life is a gift.  We are here today and can be gone tomorrow!  So many things we worry about and complain about make no difference at all in the life of eternity.  We waste so much energy and so much time complaining about life.  If there is something we are not happy about, we need to work to make changes.  If we cannot let it go and be grateful for the blessing we have in life, it can always be worse.

I have listened to so many people, for the last thirty-five years that I can remember, just complain and be negative about everything in their life with never a good word to say!  We have to wake up and realize life is truly what we make of it.  If we are negative all the time, then we create this negative energy in our lives and it grows and takes over our life.  We need to work on an attitude of Gratitude and energy of Appreciation!  When we focus on this, wow, what a beautiful life we can develop, for no matter what happens, we will always find the best in life and we will always look at the positive side of life. We will look at what we can learn from any given situation no matter how bad it may look on the outside!  This is always my focus, to look at what I can learn and how anything can benefit me to become more mature!

In life, it is not how many times we get knocked down that really matters, it is simply how many more times we get back up and keep moving forward!  In developing appreciation for all the little things we have, we begin to see from our heart that it is beautiful and we will be able to move forward each day.  I was told about a man who was always complaining about his shoes.  He was never happy no matter what kind of shoes he got.  Then one day he saw a man with no feet!  He stopped complaining about his shoes and became very grateful that he had feet!  This really sums up the whole point of the idea, which is, we need to be grateful for the many blessing we have in life!  Like breathing for example.  I think about it everyday after having severe pneumonia five times.  To breathe easily now with clear lungs, it feels wonderful to be able to take a deep breath!  So for me, I am grateful and have a deep appreciation for each breath I take!

With much Aloha!

Aaron 7-31-13

“Accepting Responsibility”

I think we all desire to grow and have a better life in pretty much every way.  Then the storms in life hit and we find ourselves asking, “Why is this happening to me?”  I used to feel this way a lot.  Now I simply work to stay calm and take in the lessons I am to learn from this particular situation. 

I think we have a very negative flaw as humans.  When something is painful or we find ourselves in a difficult position in life, we tend to turn to wanting to blame someone, something, or anyone for what is happening to us!  But when we live with this attitude, we then remain in the cycle of conflict, abuse and drama, never giving ourselves permission to be free to live our life in the solutions!  It is only when we realize we have past Karma from this life and our past lives that we have to resolve in this lifetime or at least attempt to resolve.  I have focused on this so deeply recently.  A Japanese friend of mine made a point to me.  They said, “Aaron, you are compassionate and work to do good in your life.  Sometimes it is our ancestors we are paying karma for.”

Most of us in the western society do not want to think this could be true, but I have done deep studies in all of this and find it to be a very wide spread belief and a true understanding in many cultures.  I could also look at what my parents taught and passed on to me in the way they treated me and see very clearly I am still, at fifty years old, trying to break free of the negative things they said to me and did to me.  There are certain things people can do to you when you are a child that damage your heart and soul so deeply, you find years later you are still wounded from the abuse and trauma. 

It is a daily process to heal!  When do we find complete freedom from the damage caused by our mother, father or by anyone else?  When we carry these wounds inside of us, we tend to have a reaction to things that happen in life instead of staying calm, centered, and balanced!  We are reacting from the pain of the past and sometimes we keep recreating this pain and conflict from a subconscious level.

The first big step in finding healing for ourselves is to stop the reaction of wanting to blame other people and things in life, to accept full responsibility for everything in our life and choose to change what we can, accept what we cannot change, and work to improve ourselves and take in the healing we so deeply need!  A big one I talk much about is that we have to forgive those who have harmed us.  Then we have to forgive ourselves for any bad karma we have created, like being angry with our father or mother!  This does create some really bad karma when we hold on to this anger inside of us towards anyone!  I know for me personally, this was my greatest foe to defeat, the anger I had hidden away in my heart.  This was a great factor in finding such healing in my life, body, mind, and soul, to let go of the anger and forgive!

So let us take 100% responsibility for our life and begin to manifest the positive changes we so desire!

With much Aloha!

Aaron 7-31-13

“The Maturing Soul”

The Maturing Soul, we can walk our lives each day with tenderness and compassion or we can be hard like the earth we walk on.  We can get frustrated, irritated or angry with things that happen or we can choose to live in our heart and stay in a place of compassion!

I typed this whole article and then I hit the wrong button and lost all of what I had just spent a whole hour working on!  Then I had to take some time to regain my focus and balance to start over again and try to remember as close as possible what I had just written!  I had to work to be deeply patient to rewrite the whole article, so this article I think will be of the same thought but not even close to all the same words.

This was the point I was trying to make before when the test of life came, and tests will come!  How are we going to respond?  Are we going to get angry and irritated or are we going to respond from a place of love and compassion!  Now I would say I am able to stay at peace, gentle and calm about 95% of the time, but when I fall into the 5%, I don’t like it at all!  When I was younger though, I did not even know what it meant to live in my heart, to stay balanced and focused.  I was so shy and afraid of people. If I was in my heart 30% of the time, oh that was good when I was young!  The amazing part of life is that we can choose each moment of the day how we will respond to life, how we will react.

When we wake up in the morning, what we do, what we think, what we say is a good factor of how are choices will be that day.  It is each small choice we make each day that creates our path in life!  What we say and do, all of our actions create our karma in our daily lives.  It is only you who has the power to change your life for the positive each day!  It is only you who has the potential to become amazing in life and to make positive changes.  It is like building a house.  You build it one brick at a time, one stone at a time, or one piece of wood at a time!  A house is not built in one day.  It takes time.  It is the same with learning to live in our heart!  We learn one choice at a time, one lesson at a time, and one moment at a time!  We cannot become mature in one day, nor will we learn to stay in a place of compassion in one moment!  We grow and mature each moment of each day.  It is our choices that form this foundation in our lives.  I know for me it is a daily work to stay in my heart with tenderness and compassion. I have to really focus on it and not be lazy in any way!  We have to take time to get away from all the stress.  We have to eat healthy and exercise.  There is a balance in life we have to work on to stay in our heart and compassion.  It is not just going to happen without great discipline and taking action on our part!  So we can work to be a part of the solution in our lives or we can just give into the easy path and stay in the problem!  Let us focus on being the Solution!

With much Aloha!

Aaron 7-22-13

“Changing Lives”

We see each day that we want to change and we want people around us to change.  Our thoughts are that we want people to change for the better and we want to do this ourselves also.  I know in my life, since I was young, I have been told you cannot make other people change!  Though this may have some truth, I have found it is not completely 100% true.

If we choose to change ourselves and how we interact or react with other people, then it does put the people in a position to choose to change or stay the same, though we cannot really make anyone change. My heart behind this is very simple.  If we pursue a path of love, compassion and tenderness, if we work each day to become a better person and always choose to serve others from a place of truth and compassion, then by our consistent example of real compassion, forgiveness and patience, we can lead people to want to change and make changes in their lives!  There is an old saying that goes, “we can lead a horse to water but we cannot make them drink the water.”  This is so true.  I have worked with horses for many years.  In time, the horse will get thirsty and you have to show them the water!  I learned so much about people through my years with horses.  If we listen, the animals do talk and communicate with us.  I have had the pleasure to hear them for many years.  I hear words from the animals just as I do when talking to a person.  Animals have a heart and soul and can express compassion, sometimes more deeply than people!

When we choose tenderness instead of anger, jealousy, hate or any of these negative emotions, it is with this act of compassion, forgiveness and patience in our daily lives that we truly can help to change the people around us and have a very positive effect in our world!  May we each make positive changes in the world around us by making a positive change in our own heart each moment we can!

With Much Aloha!

Aaron 7-22-13

“Patience”

In this world we live in, we are taught to be demanding of everything and to be in a hurry for everything we want.  Long before I understood much about compassion, love or humility I started to see a great need to be patient for everything in life.  Some things that I desire I have waited for more than thirty years and I find myself still waiting.  We are not very patient as human beings, nor do we like anyone to tell us we must wait.  I have five children from ages 22 to 15.  I gained a lot of patients in the years with my children but I wish I had had more patience when they were young.  I wish I could have been the man I am today with the birth of my first child!  When my children were growing up and I was there each day many times when they wanted something I would tell them to “ just be patient” then one day one of my girls looked at me very serious with her hands on her hips, 6 years old mind you, and said “Daddy, I do not like patience.”  I will never as long as I live forget this, the look on her face and she was real and completely upset with patience!  Not at all with me but she knew she did not want any more patience.  I told her you had better learn it now sweet heart for life will teach it to you whether you want to learn it or not!  I was helping a friend the other day teaching them a program for a business I work with and after a while she asked me a question and answer at the same time, “you really are very patient aren’t you Aaron?”  I said, “yes but with the correct set of circumstances I can still loose the patients that I do have”.  It is amazing how it is just gone in the moment and I find myself irritated or upset.  Now it does take a great deal for this to happen, but it always reminds me of how far I still have to grow!  I have many friends who are 25 to 35 years older than me.  For this is really more my pace of heart and energy of heart.  I seek out deeply mature souls and try to connect and learn from them in every way.  One such wise woman is a Japanese friend of mine who has been married for say fifty years.  She told me today that the greatest thing that is needed to have a long lasting marriage is patience!  You have to have tolerance and make compromises in a positive direction for the benefit of the marriage.  I love my friend very deeply and I know she has not had fifty years of an easy marriage.  But I felt in her words a truth she has learned in her life and that I too am learning in every area of my life!  As with any true virtue it is easy to talk about and think about being patient but it takes great, great, great effort every moment to live this in our daily lives!  So I hope we can each simply remember we cannot live with compassion in our heart if we do not practice patience in our heart!  Both for ourselves and for other people!  Especially those who we live with and are the closest to us!  These tend to be the most difficult ones to embrace completely!

So may we each be bold enough to hug patience close to our heart today!

With much tenderness of heart!

Aaron 7-11-13

“Victor or Victim”

In life we have many choices.  I see so many people who choose to be a victim.  We can accept responsibility for our choices and karma or we can get angry and blame other people for our choices and play the victim.

In my life, I see most people want to continue to be the victim.  It is so easy to roll over and blame everyone around us for all our difficulties and problems!  Or, we can choose to stand up and take complete responsibility for all of our choices and empower ourselves to make the changes in our lives and stop blaming everything in life for the conflict in our lives!  If we just go along with the negative things people want to do, then we are just as much the victim!

We have to be willing to stand up and make changes for the better!  Do not allow others to put us in a box and call it freedom!  We only have ourselves to blame for anything we see wrong in our lives.  It all goes back to karma; what we put into this life this is what we get back!  If we put in love and compassion, then we will get this back in the end!  If we put in drama and conflict, then we get this back!  So what will be the choice you or I make today, tomorrow and the next day?  Will we choose to move forward to a deeper love and compassion? 

We have to choose freedom to grow, mature and express love from the heart!  We do not need to play a victim roll or allow someone to keep hurting us to prove any point!  We just have to choose compassionate love for ourselves and everyone else. 

My beloved mother lived in the roll of a victim as far back as I can remember.  She died in the roll of a victim at the hands of another person.  It was deeply painful for me to watch, but it also made clear to me I do not want to follow the path of a victim!

So let us work deeply to choose to be the victor in compassion in every moment in our lives!

With much love and compassion!

Aaron 7-8-13

“Better or Bitter”

Life can, is and will always be very difficult at times.  Sometimes it feels like all the time.  We can look at all this as lessons to learn from or we can just get sucked up in the endless conflict that most people live in, for that matter most of the world is caught up in deep conflict.  So what do we do when someone hurts us very deeply, when we get cheated out of money, when we have a car crash, when we get a ticket, when we cannot pay the electric bill or our car payment?  You know the list goes on and on!  I heard this statement a long time ago, when life gets rough and we get knocked down we can respond one of two ways!  “We can become Better or we can become Bitter.”  I was around 23 when I heard this statement; it has been a very deep critical part of my daily life every moment since and each time in life when I feel myself getting angry, irritated or hurt about something I remember those two words. Honestly, just last night I was deeply hurt by someone’s actions in a way that has happened many times.  At first I was just deeply hurt, then I was irritated, then I was angry!  Then I was sad for the whole thing and I got hooked into the conflict of life again!  Then I was very remorseful and remembered those two words, “Better or Bitter”, instantly I started to relax and let go.  For no matter what happens in my life since I first heard those two words put in this form, I have always chosen to become “Better”.  I have seen too many people die in their bitterness so miserable that they cannot find any peace at all!  So for me it is a wonderful place of Aloha – Love - Compassion to simply let go of all the conflict and choose to become “Better”!  So with this in mind I hope these two words stick in your mind and heart as they have mine all these years!  Just remember no matter what we do we have a choice!

“To become Better or to become Bitter!”

With much compassion!

Aaron 6-29-13

“Do No Harm”

We all have days when we think why me?  Someone did or said something that was very hurtful or we just had a really rough day.  So we then have a choice we can react and return the pain or we can become a part of the solution!  It is easy to get irritated, angry and return negative for negative!  But it takes a deeper and more mature soul to decide to return love and compassion no matter what.  To be patient, to stay calm, to continue to be the man or woman who will do no harm!  It is much deeper than just to do no harm with our words or with our body actions, like if someone hits you that you do not strike them back.  There is a completely deeper place of achieving a life of do no harm! We have to regain the place of purity of heart and soul that we will not do any harm to anyone with our attitude or energy.  That we are so pure, so calm, and so gentle that not even in our thoughts will we hurt another soul, that our essence is pure compassion.  I have a friend who can use very calm words and keep a nice face, but cut you into little pieces with their energy.  It is necessary for us to go beyond the mind, beyond the thoughts into the core of who we are!  It is this core of who we are that has to be completely washed in compassionate energy.   With this compassion as our essence no matter what happens in our lives we will become a soul to bring healing to the people around us and to the world which all of us are in deep need of healing.  So let us purpose above all else to choose to respond to every situation in our lives with compassion and tenderness!  Let us not be the one who creates more pain in someone else.  Compassion begins with our own heart!

With peace to each,

Aaron 6-27-13

“FORGIVENESS”

I have been asked so many times over the last couple of years if there is one thing I can say I did to create or find the healing I have gone through. There are actually many things I have done and changed in my life, but two are at the top of the list!

The first was Forgiveness.  I found each time my heart would open to a deeper level and my eyes could see better, someone or something that had happened in my life would come to mind that I needed to forgive more deeply for.  I would also see that I needed to forgive myself more for something.  As I embraced this in my heart and chose to take the forgiveness to my heart, I would feel a deeper healing in my body, usually within days or sometimes almost instantly.  Without true forgiveness, compassion has very little room in our hearts!

The second thing was to let go of my ego more and release anything negative in my life, mind or heart, like irritation, anger, worry, and all the normal stuff that we tend to allow into our hearts and minds.  I have worked to daily surrender such negative energy, and again, I would feel my body respond quickly.  I feel like I am nineteen years old again and I will be fifty this year.  I am just much smarter now than when I was nineteen the first time.  So if we take to heart the old ways of wisdom and practice true compassion each day, then our minds and bodies will follow us down the path of healing as well!  For me, I have found it is in seeking purity of heart and soul, to be tender and kind in all we do, and to become a person who will do no harm!

With much compassion!

Aaron 6-27-13